I'll Reach For You (GirlXGirl)

63. I am begging you

It's Christmas Eve and there is still no sign of Hunter waking up. Today I went over to mom and dad's hotel room and took a long warm shower. Hunt's foster family where with her when I was in the hotel, so I did not need to see them today.

Amber came in with her son and wished Hunt and me a Merry Christmas and that she hoped I would get what I wish for, if it was only that easy. Hunt has been sleeping for ten days now, and there is probably going to be more.

A knock on the door makes me turn in the chair. Mom and dad come in with warm smiles across their faces and snow on their jackets and hair. The snowing do not seem to stop.

"Hi," They both say and come in. We had a deal to eat something together since it is Christmas Eve. I smile as I see dad coming with a pizza box. Best Christmas food ever, I chuckle as I smell it.

"Well, it is not really what we usually eat, but sometimes it is okay with the changes." Dad says shrugging. I asked Amber before she left if there was a way I could get more chairs in here. She said it was fine that I took those in the hallway. So I did and placed them next to the one I am sitting in.

"How are you?" Mom asks while taking out a soda from a bag.

"Hungry." I grin. She looks at me worry.

"Yes, I have eaten today." I roll my eyes. Dad place the pizza down on the table next to Hunt's bed and hand us each a piece. I take a bit and it makes my stomach growl more.

"I can't wait until we get home to eat the real Christmas dinner with everyone." Dad tells and I nod in agreement. I have been looking forward to celebrating with Hunter for a long time, and then all of it was taken away when she left, but now it is all back.

My eyes lands on Hunter, the bruise on her cheeks is starting to fade. I am happy for that, because it looks so big and hurtful and Amber took off the bandage that was around Hunt's head, yesterday. When she took it off, I saw a scar on her temple, it was shorter than my pinky finger. Like she did not have many of them from before.

After Amber took it off, she looked at me with a question written all over her face. Then she asked about the other scars on Hunt's body, she looked so worried. I told her that it is not mine to tell, but I told her, that it comes from Hunter's hell. Then she asked me if it was ever hard to be with Hunter, I nodded and told her that Hunt could sometimes be difficult to handle when she is in the low state. That is the time when she hates herself so much that it is painful to listen. I wished I could make her shut up, but I can't. One day I hope all of herself criticism will stop and be gone forever. I sigh and take a new slice of pizza.

"You okay?" Dad asks, worried and I nod.

"Yeah, just thinking."

"About what?" I look at him and roll my eyes.

"Hunter." I sigh. He smiles.

"We all do that. I don't think it's long before she will wake up." I nod. It can't be far away now. She has been lying here for days now, but for me every hour feels like a year, and I miss her more and more for every minute that passes.

"I hope so." I answer after a while, just staring at Hunter.

Mum and dad left for an hour ago, they stayed for a while. After they left, I was so tired that I could have fallen asleep in the chair next to Hunter. Then I just forced myself to get up and turn off the lights and move into the bed with Hunt. I watch the snow falling quietly down in the dark. It's not really the Christmas Eve, I had in mind this year, but I would rather stay here with Hunt then to go home. I wanted to be with her and here I am.

When Hunt wakes up, she will probably be a little upset that I was here with her instead of being with my family and celebrate. I know her enough to know that, she will not understand why I 'wasted' my time on her. I can't really get why she thinks I should put her last in line, she will always be the first one and the only one. I love her more than I have ever loved anyone or anything in my life.

She of all people should understand that, since she grew up in a loveless home, and that I am probably the only one that have shown her how much I love her and I am probably the only one she has ever loved. Maybe she just don't think she deserves it, or is not used to come first. I am not sure, but I know she will always come first. I love her, always will and I can't wait for her to wake up and look at me for the first time in two months.

"Do you remember the first time you looked at me with your crooked smile and your deep eyes? It seems like it was just yesterday you watched me like that, I can never forget that it felt like your eyes were swallowing my heart. You just took everything in me, and I just had to give it you. I wanted you so bad that I simply just had to and I did not care if I had to pour out my heart and soul to you, because I already did that when you looked at me. I love you so much, and I just want you to wake up for me." I cry and feel the warm tears break out of my eyes, but I take them away before they could come down my face.

"I am begging you to come back for me." I cry and kiss her shoulder. Talking to her and not getting a response is starting to tear at my heart. I am not even sure if she can hear me or even feel me here, but I am willing to try anyway. She is my world and I am not giving up.