Call Me Six

27: 'You're Fucking Crazy' -Tobias

TOBIAS-

When we eventually arrived at the house I once called home, she just sat. Tris sat for hours, just staring into space. Sometimes, she'd cry; silently.

I prepared soup for lunch and a salad for dinner. She wouldn't eat either.

"Tris," I whispered, cupping her face in my hands. "Tris, please say something; you're scaring me."

She sighed, her teeth latching on to her bottom lip and looked me in the eye for the first time all day. "I'm all alone. I have no family left, Tobias," she said and her gaze dropped quickly.

"No, don't say that. You're not alone." All she did was let out a shaky laugh. "You have me. You have me, Tris. I'll be your family now."

For some unknown reason she merely started to laugh louder. Standing and pacing the room she said, "Are you fucking crazy?" Her hands pulled through her hair as her eyes bore wildly into mine. "Have you forgotten what you've done? You ridiculed me. You made me trust you. You fucking asshole!"

"My sister has just died and you feel like now is the appropriate time to bring up the past?! I lo- I care about you, Tris. Is that so hard for you to believe?

"You're not the only one with problems, you know that, right? You're not the only one that's all alone... At least you still have someone that cares for you unlike I do."

She just stood there. Her shoulders rigid as she stood, still as stone.

It was like that for some time, both of us standing in a stare down - waiting for someone to make the first move.

But the first move was unexpected.

We both launched forward, clinging desperately to each other before collapsing. Remaining that way on the carpet floor - paralysed in each other's grip.

"Tobias," she whimpered, "I have to tell you something."

"What?"

"I hate you."

"I hate you too."

"Tobias..."

"What?"

"I lied."

Thank God.

"So did I."

~

It was becoming a tradition... The living-room was filled with the pungently sweet smell of smoke.

The stereo was blaring loudly with whatever music we could find. We must have been a sight to see... Two idiots dancing around high and drunk listening to the Frozen soundtrack.

"I give up," I screamed whilst falling down to the floor in laughter. "Tell me why you changed so much, Tris?"

"Well," she slurred and flopped down onto the leather couch and started to hum along to the song. "We live in a land of clichés," her intoxicated voice made every word sound so eerily cheerful, "I'm simply filling my role."

Her body rolled clumsily off the couch and landed with a thud as she joined me on the floor. I reached out, pulling her to lay on top of me.

"And what," I said gazing down as she fiddled with the collar of my shirt, "the fuck, does that mean?"

"It means..." She pouted weirdly mid-sentence whilst reaching for a half empty bear bottle and downing the rest of it. "People are always looking for someone to hate. When my parents died in the fire, Caleb blamed me for it. And I guess it technically was my fault because I was the one that lit the candles...

"I was supposed to lose my virginity that night, Tobias... I was ready and I wanted to share that moment with you - and I know that sounds so ridiculously cheesy but it's true. I loved you and I wanted to show that.

"Anyway when they came home suddenly and we rushed out my bedroom window, I must have forgotten to blow out the candles, because then next thing I knew was that I woke up on the couch and the whole of the upstairs was drowning in those stupid flames.

"What's so romantic about candles anyway? They're literally little blocks of wax with some string that burns in the middle of them...

"If I had gone back up to my room once you'd left, I'd have either saved my parents by blowing the bloody things out or have died alongside them...

"I'm the reason my parents died, Tobias...  And all I got was some broken bones and a few burns.

"The entire fucking house burnt down, Tobias! Everything!

"So... I basically lost my entire family that day. Caleb couldn't even stand to look at me in the months that followed.

"But then, when you abandoned me, I literally had no one. Zilch. Nada. Nothing. Not a single fucking person. So... I had nothing to care about.

"Did you know Sarah Linney, Tobias? She died last year. She killed herself because they called her a whore.  The whole school thought she was a hoe-"

"But," I cut her off, "she was fourteen."

"So?" She said, her eyebrows quirking upwards, "She was irresponsible, had sex, got pregnant, and decided to keep the baby. Personally, I believe that she was incredibly brave. But people are monsters. Monsters, Tobias.

"Anyway... I thought that maybe, just maybe, I could prevent all that shit from happening again. You see, if people have their prey - an easy target - then why would they bother attacking someone else; someone who wasn't such easy prey. I figured, 'hey, I have nothing to lose, why not?' So... I became the- how did you put it? Blonde Whore." Tris smirked, laughing silently to herself as her hair fell into her face. I tried to tuck it behind her ears but she just continued to swat at my hands.

The music ended and the house fell silent. Only the rhythmic sounds of our potent breaths filled the air.

"You're fucking crazy."

She shrugged and attempted to drain the already empty bottle once more before saying, "I know."