You Guys Should Be Used To Me By Now

Dreams Are Rare For Me, Especially Pregnant Ones.

Once I got home from training, I got into the shower. I had washed my hair enough so all the gel was gone, it was a major pain in the booty. I had finally gotten ready for bed. Lately, I had not been able to get my sexy sleep as much. But that night, I just had a feeling that I would get some great sleep. As soon as my head hit the pillow, I drifted off to sexy land.

"Tsunade! Why must you sexually harass me every day?" An annoyed Jiraiya snapped once I was in sexy land. Though, sexy land was just basic Konoha setting. For the moment.

"Your boobs are just so big." A wide eyed Tsunade said, and stared at Jiraiya's great boobs. Tsunade was the flat one, while Jiraiya had the boobs. Both of them were not their usual selves, so I decided to get to the bottom of this.

"You are a total sleaze ball. Let me just go get some sake." Jiraiya snapped and slapped Tsunade across the face.

"Ow! No need to be so rough with my merchandise." Tsunade said and rubbed her cheek.

"I'm going away now, and if you follow me, I promise you will not have any feet left to help you get to your destinations." Seriously, Pervy Sage warned, and then stomped away.

"Aw man, you got shot down." I said to Tsunade and put an arm around her for comfort.

"It's just, his boobs are so big! How can I resist them?" She asked me and began to anime cry. Desperately, she held her hands in front of her and began to anime cry more. "Right where my hands are, is where his boobs should be!"

"Mika, I have come here to ask if you will marry me." A sexy voice said in front of me. Excitedly, I looked up to see Gaara. One thing was really off about him though, he looked pregnant. "I can not support a child on my own."

"So you're pregnant?" I asked him.

"Yes." Sexily, he answered back to me.

"Who's the father?" In awe, I asked with wide eyes.

"Sasuke."

I anime fell and began to cry a river.

"Dang it Sasuke! Why do you have to steal all of my men?!" I yelled and kept crying.

"You are right, I should go ask Sasuke for help. Thank you for that idea." Gaara said, and walked away in thought. In search of comfort, I looked around me to see if Tsunade was there. She was no where in sight.

"Poop deck." Sadly, I muttered under my breathe and had a sad aura around me. I began to walk around the village to see who else would keep me comfort. It was very weird because nobody was on the streets. It was the middle of the day and all the fruit carts were on the streets, but no people were there.

 "Sasuke! How could you!" A voice yelled, and once I figured out what direction it came from I sprinted there.

"I'm so sorry babe! It was a one night stand!" Dramatically, Sasuke said in defense and teared up a bit.

"I was told that one night stands are not a good thing." Gaara said, and rubbed his pregnant belly.

"I thought we had something special!" Kankuro yelled, and began to anime cry a whole river of tears.

"Obviously not special enough, because he dated me too." Sassily, Neji said and walked towards everyone.

"He was my first though!" Naruto yelled, and jumped down from a building. He landed in a ninja pose, and quickly stood up.

"Sorry, I can't control the situation down there." Sasuke said and pointed at his crotch. "It just has a mind of its own."

On the sideline, I giggled to myself at the scene going on in front of me. I had never seen Sasuke even mention his crotch until that moment. My life had just been made.