You Guys Should Be Used To Me By Now

Let's Talk About Sex

"Is this really necessary?" TenTen groaned as I dragged her through out the vilage.

"Fo shizzle." Quickly, I replied and continued to drag her along. "We need to find Gaara."

Somehow again, all the Leaf village teams managed to make it to the third round. Since there were less people than the first Chunin exam, there was no need for preliminaries. We had a day off to rest before they showed us who we were fighting against, since they had yet to form a list. Least to say, I was very nervous to think about who I could possibly have to fight against.

"Just because you like him does not mean you have to stalk him." Grumpily, TenTen muttered and rolled her eyes.

"Are you a bit grumpy becuase I woke you up for this?" Curiously, I asked her and looked at her with a raised eye brow.

"It was my only day off and I wouldn't have to train! You took that away from me!" TenTen wailed outloud, and I just stuck my tongue out.

"You're welcome." I said, and saw an anime vein form on her forehead. "Oh come on! I would do this if you wanted me to help you find your man, or woman." TenTen's eyes widened, and I continued. "You should know that me, out of all people, don't judge."

"Baka." She grunted and face palmed. Just then, I saw red hair for a second but it disappeared. My eyes widened in awe, ran towards it, and pulled TenTen forward. "Oph!"

"Gaara!" Obnoxiously, I yelled and jogged over to Gaara with TenTen in tow. When he heard his name, he stopped and waited for me.

"Yes?" He asked, when I had caught up to him.

"Uh.. I... Want to have sex?" Stupidly, I blurted out and TenTen face palmed.

"This is too painful to watch." She said to herself and shook her head. "I can tell this will be great to watch though."

"What is sex?" Gaara asked me with no emotion in his voice. My jaw dropped in shock, and TenTen had to attempt to not laugh like a maniac.

"Kankuro and T-Temari never explained it to you?" In shock, I asked with wide eyes. He turned around and looked me in the eyes.

"No, what is it?" He asked me with his eye brows furrowed together.

"Well, uh, sex is when a man takes his meat and puts it into a meat grinder." Was the brilliant explanation I came up. "No wait!" I said and waved my arms around. "That's not what I meant, it was a metaphor." My cheeks were so red, it was obvious that TenTen was enjoying it.

"What does it actually mean?" Curiously, he asked me and I sighed.

Sassy me: Time to let my inner demon take control.

"So a man and woman decide to have some special time together. It can be man and man, or woman and woman, or man and man and woman and woman and a parrot. We're just going to focus on man and woman right now though." My mouth wouldn't stop. Mentally, I was begging for TenTen to stop me, but she was too busy being amused by me.

"Curses. I really need to start thinking things through before I pull people into stuff." I thought to myself and went on more.

"You see, a man has a thing in his crotch-toral area called a p-" Thankfully, some one had come to save me from being stupid. My eyes looked up to see a very grumpy Kankuro.

"Why do you think he got out the house early this morning?" Kankuro asked me while his eyes were glaring at my existence. "So then he would not have to deal with you-"

"What is sex?" Gaara cut Kankuro off in midsentence. Shock was all over Kankuro's face, and he glared at me more, if it was even possible.

"Temari and I will tell you soon. Come on, let's go." Kankuro said and began to walk away. "Now I'm going to have to talk about sex to my younger brother. Damn it, Mika." He muttered as he walked away.