When I grow up | JiHan

Chapter 11 : Junghan

"Can we talk?"

"Are you talking to me?"

"Moron who do you think I'm talking to?" He said I can sense the impatience in his voice.

"What is it Jisoo?"

"Why don't you just quit?"

"W-what did you say?"

He scoffs, "You don't belong to this group Junghan, why did you join us in the first place? Your voice sucks so does your dancing skills. You will just bring a bad luck to Seventeen. Can't you feel that you're not welcomed here?"

I counted one to ten and let his words like knives wash over me, it's okay Junghan it's just words, it isn't true, the others want me here.

"Yah! Answer me!" He said

I look at him and fight off the tears with a smile, "Is that all Jisoo? Sorry but I already signed a contract, don't worry I'll stay far away from you as much as I could, good night." I said turning my back on him and went straight for the door of my room, but he grabs me by the shoulder, his grip tight.

"Stop acting kind it doesn't fit you and can't you see I am still talking to you, how dare you turn your back on me?"

"I am not acting kind" I said through gritted teeth, "I just don't care about what you say, if you don't want me here I am not the one who will adjust for you." I said trying my best to be strong. I shrug his hands off me and turn my back on him, he tried getting my attention again but I didn't bother to look back at him because I knew he would just say mean things to me, I walked out and started running.

It's freezing out here, I don't have anything useful in my pockets, I don't even have a money, what would I do? Should I get back to the dorm? Where should I go? I can't sleep here in the streets paparazzi might see me and this is bad for the reputation of Seventeen. I walked along the parks and gathered my thoughts.

Should I quit? I don't belong anywhere, do I? I shake my head, there's only one place that I feel like I belong to. I went back to the dorm, luckily Jisoo isn't there anymore, I went quietly to my room and packed some clothes, grab my wallet and the things I might need while traveling, I'll just text Seungcheol in the morning. I was quick to get out of the house, I bought a bus ticket to Busan, maybe I'll just go to my grandmother's house, I brace myself as I enter the bus, I took a seat and rest my head against the window pane.

Back then I didn't feel like I belong but Jisoo came along and I found home. I belong to him back then but now he's gone, I am nothing again.

That's the last thing inside my head before drifting off to sleep.

○○○

I woke up with 500 messages on my phone and most of them came from Seungcheol, shit I forgot to text him, I was about to reply but he abruptly called, should I answer it? I shake my head, he would just ask me where am I and make me come back home. No a big no NO, I turned my phone to silent mode and looked at the view, the bus came to a stop.

I was startled so I asked my seat mate, "Why did we stop?"

She looks at me smiling, "We're now at the Busan Terminal"

"Ah, thank you" I said looking away, I got my back pack and checked my things, I dialed my grandma's number and on the fifth ring she answered.

"Junghannie, why did you call?"

"Grandma, can I come over to your house?"

"Wae? It's fine, where are you? Your parents? Do they know?"

"Let's talk about that later, I'm now at the Busan Bus Terminal"

"I'll send my driver to fetch you, do you have enough money to eat? Are you hungry?"

"Yes grandma, I'm a big boy now I can handle myself, thanks."

"Okay okay see you later take care Junghannie"

"Bye grandma" I said hanging up.

I went straight to the fast food nearby and ordered something to eat, I checked my phone and Seungcheol is calling me again, I sigh and answer it.

"Hello! YOON JUNGHAN ARE YOU ALRIGHT!?"

"I'm fine Seungcheol why?"

"WHERE ARE YOU!? I'VE BEEN CALLING YOU AND MESSAGING YOU BUT THERE IS NO REPLY WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?"

"I'm fine Cheol, calm down. Why did you call?"

"Because I'm worried, please tell me where you are"

"I- I'm at Busan"

Seungcheol took a pause before answering, "What!? What are you doing there?"

"I came to visit my grandmother."

"Ah is that so? We're going there too."

And now it's my turn to be surprised, "What!? Why? No you can't, please I don't want to see-"

"You don't want go to see who?"

"Bye Seungcheol"

"JUNGHAN-"

And I hang up, I shouldn't have told him my location at least they don't know the house of my grandmom.

"Yoon Junghan?"

"Jackson" I said with a voice so cold that I didn't even recognize my own.

•••

AUTHOR'S NOTE

For those who aren't familiar with Jackson anymore, Jackson is Junghan's best buddy back then but when he was beeing bullied, Jackson did nothing and helped the bullies to make Junghan's life a living hell, it's in the chapter 9.