Burned Intentions

Back to School

Bye Aunt Claire, see you later..

Bye, enjoy your first day at school.

I groan and she laughs and drives off. The atmosphere hasn't changed much, everyone is pretty much doing what they're always doing, the group of smokers by the fence, the "lover's tree" where couples sit and talk about sucking face#blaaah, then obviously my group of friends up on the balcony, shouting out random things.

Yo guys, it's Skylar. Yo Sky up here! Get it! Up here and your name is Sky! Kyle shouts.

I chuckle at his comment. He just HAD to announce my arrival. Now I'm clustered with pity from everyone. How does everyone even know? I walk up the stairs into the corridor and the entire squad jumps on me screaming my name and drawing too much attention to us. I laugh, I won't lie this literally makes me feel better.

Haha hey guys. What's with all the hugging, it's not like I died or something. I laugh.

Everyone goes quiet.
Bad joke.

I'm kidding, geez! Can you guys ease up please! And Mr.Kyle you just had to announce my arrival, really! Considering how much I love the attention of the student body. I add on a thick layer of sarcasm.

Haha sorry darling, I shouldn't have. Especially since you seem to be trying a new hairstyle. He chuckles.

I look at him a little puzzled.

He's right you know. Lea says, you look like a young medusa, wrath shall fall on whoever looks upon thee. She giggles.

What happened yo? Long night? Flora says.

You're even asking, doesn't how I look just scream "I don't want to be here". I sigh.

Come, come. We can't have you looking like this on your first day back! Ana says, plus this gives me a reason to visit the ladies room. Come Lea stop sucking face. I'm sure Flora's face will still be here when we get back.

You're just jealous because you don't have someone to suck face with! Flora shouts as we walk away from the crowd.

Lea laughs at these two's snarky remarks. Lea and Flora are by far the weirdest couple. They've been together since 9th grade and are the first people to go public about their relationship. Since everyone shun's anything that doesn't go by the norms of society. Such basic people. Lea is this beautiful, kind and loving person, then Flora definitely lives up to her name. The reincarnated flower child, she has a hippy vibe, she's very free spirited. I guess they just work together.

So Miss Medusa, I saw you and lover boy walking together after the funeral fiasco. What's that about? Ana nudges me.

Lover boy? Lea clearly looking confused.

I giggle.

She means Jesse, Lea. He walked me to my aunts car. We spoke about random stuff. OH YEAH! OH MY GOSH!! Reminds me, you see how I sometimes zone out and my subconscious takes over? They nod. Well this time I was drooling over Jesse and the next thing I know I'm leaning in wanting to kiss him. Like it just happened, one moment we're talking then the next thing I leaned in and he saw but I just laughed it off and said he was overthinking the situation, I just wanted a hug. I say and cover my face.

So I was right, you did want to kiss me.

I spin around and Jesse was standing right behind me. My cheeks flush.

No, no! I didn't mean it like that. Ok, not that I didn't, I did want to kiss you, but didn't. I-I-I...

So which is it huh Skylar. He's looking at me like he's trying not to smile.

I stood there, I just felt Ana and Lea looking at me.

I was- I was- uhm. It was a tough day you know, I didn't mean to. I just wanted to see how you'd react you know. I laughed awkwardly punching his shoulder softly.

So if I did this, he leans in, only inches away from my face, your first instinct would be you need to pull away since you don't actually want to kiss me?

I close my eyes and gulp. My body screaming to be close to his. He's breathing in my face and he smells so damn good.

I-I... I open my eyes and stare into his. It's like I got caught up in the way our eyes seem to speak on behalf of us. I let my subconscious take over and I press my lips against his. He's mouth molds into mine and he pulls away and looks like he didn't expect me to kiss him.
I turn on my heels and run into the girls bathroom.

Did Jesse literally just put his face him that close to mine or was I day-dreaming again. Did I really just kiss him and then run away. It's like he didn't want me to. But why lean into me like that if you don't want me to kiss you! My mind goes on stupid and impulsive mode when he's around, that's just not good. I need to distance myself from him, I can't like him more than I already do it's not fair. Besides we'll start dating, if we do, then 6 months later we're off to different places. What's the point of investing in something if it's just going to end up in a shitty manner. I don't think so. I'd rather pull away now when I still have myself intact than when everything is shattered all around and I'm left vulnerable at his touch.

*********

I basically avoided him most of today. Finally it's after school.
The squad and I are standing by our usual point of of pick up, where we wait for our parents to pick us up. Kyle making jokes as usual.

Hey Skylar. We need to talk.

Jesse. I breathe.

Well so much for avoiding.

I have to go my aunt is waiting for me.
I say trying to walk away.

Skylar you can't do this, you've been avoiding me all day.

No.

I start walking away and Jesse grabs my arm.

What the hell do you want Jesse!

I want you dammit!

I gasp.

I-I I just can't have you!

Everyone is looking at us and Ana has her mouth open.

Why can't you huh! I'm shouting, I don't know why.

Because Skylar, I -

The hoot of a car. I turn to see Aunt Claire's grey and black Mercedes Benz G63 amg with tinted windows. I look back to confront Jesse about his confession and he's gone...