Harry's POV
I felt like a deer caught in headlights and I'm sure I looked like one too. What would I tell him? I could lie and say I'm on my period but he knows I'm on testosterone and I wouldn't get it anymore plus I'm trying to earn his trust back so I can't lie but what was I supposed to say? Oh hey Louis I cut myself last night for the first time in about a year and oh yeah I did it for about 4 years before that too? No of course I can't say that.
"Haz, Love what's wrong?" He looked at me with such compassion and love. After everything I've done he just forgave me and it's hard to find someone like him, I really did love him. All my emotions just came tumbling down and I crumpled into his arms sobbing.
"I'm s-sorry I'm s-so sorry it was t-too m-much, I c-couldn't stand the thought of losing y-you, I f-felt like a failure." He just held me but then he finally understood what I was talking about and he gasped. He's going to think I'm even more of a freak now. I started to cry harder, I needed him, I couldn't function if he left me and last night was an example of that.
"P-please boo, you c-can't leave m-me, I'm s-sorry!" He let go of me and got up off the bed, this was it, he was leaving. I closed my eyes and just waited to hear my door open and shut but it never did, instead I felt him grab my hands.
"Can you open your eyes for me angel?"
I opened my eyes and saw him kneeling on the floor in front of me. He continued to look me in the eyes as he slowly rolled up my sleeves, my breath caught in my throat but I allowed him to continue. He unwrapped the bandages and for a moment he just stared at the cuts on my arms. Did he think I was disgusting? That thought was quickly diminished as he kissed each one of my cuts before he lifted my chin and kissed me softly.
"You're beautiful."
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A week had come and gone and Louis was sitting with me in the surgeon's office waiting for him to come in. The door opened and he walked in.
"Hello I'm Dr. Phil" (my creativity is low right now lol) I shook his hand then Louis did the same.
"So I've reviewed all of your files and your medical history and you're a perfect candidate for bottom surgery. We can go ahead and schedule the surgery for January 11th. That's in exactly a week from now. Does that sound good?"
"Yes that sounds great thank you."
"do you have any questions?" Louis spoke up.
"Um what exactly happens during this surgery?"
"We take the skin of the labia and flip it inside out which would create the scrotum and then we pull the clitoris out and elongate it, creating a penis. It will be fully functioning." (I know in real life it can't be functioning but I'm making it functioning for my fic.)
"So if you'll just sign these forms Mr. Styles we'll go ahead and secure your surgery date." I took the papers and signed them then handed them back to him.
"Okay everything is all set. Here is all the information you need to know about the procedure and I'll see you in a week."
"Thank you so much."
We left the office and got back into Louis' car.
"How do you feel Harry?"
"Great, I've been waiting for this. I can't wait to tell Ni about this when we see him in a few days. He's pretty much gone through this whole journey with me." Louis pressed a kiss to my temple and then started the car, grabbing my hand before starting to drive back to my house.
Ok honestly this would have been longer but I've been distracted by a Keeping up with the Kardashians marathon since this morning but I promised I'd update today so here it is.
YOU ARE READING
I'm Still The Same-A Larry Stylinson and Niam Horayne Fanfic (AU)
Fanfiction"why would I choose to make my life harder?" or the one where Harry gets himself stuck in a web of lies just to keep his secret safe.
