if i love you

twenty

I'm look at Haze walking to the house. The house that could bring it all back. I run after him and the first thing I see is my baby's body laying on the floor. Then John with a wooden stake.

I look at Haze then, Poppy's body then John. My head starts hurting and I feel really sick. I would rather be pregnant again. The pain in my head keeps getting worst and worst to where I am crying on the floor. I look up and I don't see Haze anymore.

Flash back

I see my dad walking over to me with a belt in his hand. My real mom was bleeding. I scream for help but no one comes.

"Your not mine! That bitch of a mother you have, said your not mine. So I can do as I please to you! And I say take off you clothes! NOW!" He yelled but I didn't listen. He grabbed me and pulled me into his room. "I said NOW." He yelled again.

I still don't listen so he gets his knife and cuts my shirt off then my skirt. I was left in my bra and underwear.

He lays me in the bed and ties my hands up. He pulled my bra off and touches me and I cried for him to stop but he doesn't. He raped me. "Your my slut now. You do as I say when I say it. I will take you body any time I want! And if you tell anyone I will kill you both! Now get out of my room slut!" He yelled at me.
I went to my room and cried. My mom walks in the room. She was cut up and looked really bad.

"I'm so sorry Rosey. Please forgive mama for not helping you. Please baby." She cried. We held each other all night.

End of flash back

I look up and see John's body on the floor and Haze holding Poppy's body, crying. I look at John and smile. That asshole got what was coming to him.

My head starts hurting again. Haze looks up at me and drops Poppy. He pulls me into his arms and kisses my forehead. I cry into him then he is gone again.

Memory

Mama and I are walking into a big house. A man is standing at the top on the stares. He looks at me and smiles. Mama hugs him and we follow him into a room with a bed. Mama sits on the bed and the man looks at me.

"Violet? Is this my little girl?  Is this the little girl you and I made?" He asked. Mama looks at me and nods. He walks to me and smiles. I try to find somewhere to hide. After daddy hurt me, I don't like men. They scare me.

"What is wrong with her? Violet what did he do!?!" He yelled at mama. I start to cry and move over to mama on the bed. She picks me up and smiles.

"He raped her and beat her. He said she was his slut now. That's why I'm here. He is going to kill me, James. He just wants her now. I'm scared for my life. That is why I want you to block our memories. I want all three of our memories gone. And when I die, I want Rose to stay with him. I want his second chance mate as me. I want it all gone. Never to come back. And for him I want you to wait till he kills me. I'm done with this life. Please do this for me." Mama said looking at him with hope.

I don't want mama to die! I want the man who hurt us to!

Mom walked over to the table and picked up a knife.

"James please promise me that you will look after Rose. You will take care of her if she needs you. Make this my dieing wish, please do this for me. I love you James. I wish you were my mate but your not. Do this for me and our little girl." She said as she cut her hand and gave the knife to James.  He took the knife and cut his hand and held it out. They put there hands together and a light comes from there hand.

"Mommy? I want to stay out. I don't want to go home please don't take me home!" I cry as she walked up to me. She smiled and we walked home.

End of memory

I am laying in Hazes arms crying about what was going on in my head. I was beat, raped, and called a slut at such a young age. My dad. The man I thought would always protected me. He hurt me more then anyone. He made me have sex with him, just because I wasn't his kid.

My best friend, his mate, my baby, and my memories are all dead. The stuff I needed for life. I loved them all at one time. I cry for my lost, I cry for my baby. I cry for my mom I never knew. I feel as if I have lost and gained tonight.

My mate is not the same as he was when we started. I am not the same as I was when we started.

"Haze? Is this what  happens if I love you? " I asked.  He smiles and kisses my head. I smile and kiss his lips. "Its to late to ask that little mate. I done love you more then my life. I would do anything for you! Rose will you stay with me? Stay with me as long as I was living. Please don't leave me!" He said.

"Yes I will stay with you and do anything I can to stop the man from hurting us. I will kill him for us. But first I want to meet my real dad. Please I need to meet him!" I ask. Looking at him with a smile. And he nods at me. I will find him and find out about my mom. I will find out where I started!

The end.