Adam's POV:
I really appreciate it, how Sauli cares about me and how he wants to help me, to make me feel better. But: nothing can help me. Nothing can bring my voice back.
I really do love Sauli, but he has to accept, that I rather want to be alone at the time. I don't want to make out with him or something like that. Not because of him, he did nothing wrong. I'm the problem. I just can't stand people being near me right now. I hope Sauli can understand that. I hope I will be normal again some day. Maybe a miracle happens. Or maybe there's a doctor, who can bring my voice back. Next week I'll go to the hospital and ask.
So last night I told Sauli about my nightmare. It was the first time, where we actually had a conversation this day. Sauli has started to realize that I wanted to be alone, so he doesn't talk to me much. I stopped talking- or should I say typing- almost completely, I only answer Sauli's questions.
Anyway, Sauli was so cute and understanding yesterday, that I felt sorry for not wanting to cuddle with him. I could see he was disappointed, but what else should I do? I'll kiss him again when I feel like doing it, no worries.
Today I wake up before Sauli does. Wow, I've finally slept well one night. I stay besides him in bed and watch him for some minutes. Sauli is so beautiful when he's sleeping! After a while I grab my phone to check my social networks. It breaks my heart to see thousands of glamberts worrying about me. I see pictures of crying fans on instagram, a bunch of twitter messages with wishes for me to get my voice back. I know that there are glamberts, whose biggest dream is to see me perform live or to talk to me. Well, it hurts to say that, but that may never happen. A tear runs down my face. I quickly wipe it away, then get up and get dressed.
I make some eggs for breakfast, I planned on eating at least a little bit today, so Sauli has nothing to worry about. I think I really did him a favor by eating breakfast, because Sauli is smiling the whole time while we are eating.
Later Sauli goes shopping for some new shoes. He goes alone, I want to stay at home again. I pass the time by looking at pictures and videos of my glam nation tour. It makes me cry a couple times, I knew it would. I can't help watching them though, I miss my career so much.
When I hear some noise coming from the front door I quickly run to the bathroom and wash my face with cold water, that Sauli doesn't notice I had been crying again.
Then I go downstairs to welcome my boyfriend. Sauli was carrying a big plastic bag.
"Look, Adam, I bought new shoes!"
He smiles takes a pair of wine red shining boots out. They perfectly suit him. Sauli seems to be really happy about them. I lift one thumb up to signalize that I like them, too.
"I also got some for you!"
He hands me a pair of black and military green leather boots. I've never seen such beautiful shoes before. How can I tell him that? I turn my head around quickly to search for something to write on, but Sauli makes it easier for me.
"Do you like them?"
I nod smiling. Then we just stare at each other awkwardly. When the silence gets to awkward I lean forward, hug my boyfriend briefly and then leave the room without looking at him.
Sauli's POV:
Of course I'm glad he likes his new shoes. But I hoped I would at least get a kiss from him. Adam just hugged me very briefly instead and went upstairs to take a shower. I sigh. Last days I'd been the only one who Adam is communicating with, and he doesn't even want to. I wish I could do anything to change that. I really miss how Adam was before the accident.
After a while I go upstairs and dressed in a tanktop and boxers, ready to go to bed. I lay down on my back with a big cussion under my head and check through my phone, like I always do before sleeping.
Then I heard the water stopping in the bathroom next door and after a few minutes Adam comes in half naked, only a towel around his waiste. I can't help but stare at his beautiful body and then watch him putting boxers and a tshirt on. Adam was standing with his back to me, but only seeing his sexy body from behind makes my erection grow in my boxers.
Adam turns around and catches me staring at him.
"I'm sorry, you're just so beautiful!"
Adam crawls next to me in the bed and looks at me. He's got such pretty eyes! I can't hold it, I have to kiss him now! For a short moment I don't care, whether he wants it or not. The only thing I want is to finally feel his lips on mine again. I've already been waiting too long. So I lean over, grab Adam's neck and press my lips on his.
