The Next Morning //Nouis// boyxboy ✅

Chapter 18

Louis

Niall came out of the bathroom, shirtless and damp. I was sitting on the bed naked with my phone still in my hands. This was a disaster, nothing good comes from having sex with women. Niall didn't say anything as he walked over to me, he just sat and put a hand on mine.

"I need to meet with her" I spoke quietly. "We need to discuss the arrangement of the baby and all that mumbo jumbo" I leaned into Niall's side. "I don't think I'm ready to be a dad Ni, I want to, I've always wanted children. I just don't think I'm ready"

Niall kissed my temple. "You'll be ready, you'll be great" I shook my head how could he say that?

"We... We have a tour coming up Niall. I'm away too often... This won't work, I shouldn't be a father" How am I supposed to help care for a baby that I won't be around for? That's not what I wanted at all.

"You'll make it work" he tipped my head back and kissed me gently. "Now, I'll get you some clothes and call the Chinese place" I nodded and watched as he walked to my suitcase, shifting through the clothes finding something appropriate.

I was just left to sit and think about what would come of the meeting. Should I tell her I want nothing to do with it? No, I can't do that. I can't live knowing I have a baby and have nothing to do with it. Unlike some of my family.

"Louis" I was pulled out of my daze by Niall. I looked over to him where he stood at my suitcase holding a packet. "Louis what is this?" in his hand was a half full packet of cigarettes. The boys thought I quit, and I would love to say I did. But I guess I just cut back.

"I-" I was a loss of words. "Niall... I got really stressed back home with Lottie and everyone just being on top of me. I needed something, I needed that release and they help me" Niall walked over to me and knelt between my legs, he handed me the box.

"How long has this been happening?" I looked down to him. "How long since you told us you quit?" I sighed. This was going to hurt.

"I never really quit... I just, I just didn't have them as often? Those were the first smokes in a while, I just got stressed. I'm sorry" I broke off into a sob. "I'm sorry" Niall wiped my tears. But didn't say anything to comfort me. "I can't promise I'll quit Niall"

"I never said that you had to"

"You were thinking it. Niall, please understand that this helps me. It's not a regular thing" his hands dropped to my thighs and pushed himself up. Was he seriously going to walk away from me?

"I'm going to order food. Anything you want in particular?" I shook my head and he walked off. I didn't get it, smoking wasn't that bad. Why was he so mad that I was doing it.

Starting to get cold, I grabbed the first items of clothing I saw and pulled them on to my body. The sweat shirt I put on was a long gray one that covered all of my hands, and it now seemed like a dress on my small body. I looked down at myself and felt disgusted. I wanted to cry and hit myself being so stupid and getting to this state, I didn't know how to change it.

Niall came back into the room and found me kneeling on the ground crying. He immediately came down to my level and took me in his arms.

"I'm sorry baby" he pressed kisses to my face. "I'm sorry, I was mad. I forgive you" I just sniffled. "You lied to us"

"I'm sorry. God I can't do anything without fucking up" I wanted to hit something, or myself. I needed to do something to physically hurt myself. I then hit the ground with my fist and did it repeatedly until Niall stopped me. My knuckles were red and blood was coming to the surface from the carpet.