Seven Frosted Days

Obsession

~Jack~

I knew I shouldn't have done this. I always give myself good advice, but very seldom follow it. This is not how it was supposed be, how it was supposed to go. I should be getting over her step by step. Not step by step getting more obsessed. I dropped the paintbrush and took a step back, my head throbbing. When did I last go to sleep? All these spontaneous question running through my mind. I can feel the obsession eating at me. Where did I go wrong, where did I make the wrong decision? I asked myself. It was pointless even if I knew, what good what it do to me? I wouldn't be able to change the past, all it would do was eat at me even more. That's it, I was being eaten alive, eaten by this horrible feeling. It was horrible, but I loved it, I was addicted to this feeling. I wouldn't give it up even if for the world, not until the sun and the moon were both in my hands. That would be the symbol, for my love for her.

I needed sleep, because I could practically feel my sanity slipping away. The crazy thoughts I'm thinking right now were the proof. I am aware of this, yet it won't stop. Would it ever stop? Do I want it to stop?

I looked back up at the painting I had just finished, it was perfect. I had captured every aspect of her:

The eyes were the same vibrant green, speckled with gold. The pale purple dress I had her wear was just as detailed, down to the very last thread. The rosy complexion was so similar to hers that it made me blush. Her pose was the definition of elegance and grace. She looked so graceful in this humble painting of her, but in reality she was such a clumsy awkward girl. Her hand elegantly draped over her thin waist, placed exactly at the curve of her hips, and my favorite part was her hair, like thin golden threads, that shined beautifully in the sunlight. Painting hair was my favorite part, I loved painting it, so much that it eventually  reached the ground. Rapunzel's hair obviously wasn't actually that long, but it would be a dream come true if it was. To be honest this wasn't Rapunzel at all, it was only charade, the real Rupunzel wouldn't have looked so classy, or wore such an expensive dress. The only thing that made me sure it was Rapunzel, were her bare feet. It was so like her. I had offered her shoes at the time, but she refused. Saying that she would never wear something as uncomfortable as that. I had insisted, but she was just as stubborn, and in the end I just couldn't say no. I smiled at the memory, but the sense of happiness quickly vanished as quickly as it came, because that is all I had left of her, memories.

I just couldn't have enough of her, I knew that I should ruin this painting, throw a can of black paint on it, or tear it apart, like I had did with Elsa's painting, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I convinced myself that I just needed some time, I had just finished the painting, it was logical that I wouldn't want to ruin it it right away?

Lies.

All things heal in time, right? Then thats all I need.

Lies.

I was straight out lying to myself. I just couldn't handle this by myself, but I didn't have anyone to go to. Rapunzel is gone, Elsa won't answer my calls, my brother is an asshole, and my parents.........don't get me started.

I buried my face into my hands, and cried for the first time, in a very long time. I was just facing facts.

I was all by myself, an I don't think I will be able to me make with just myself. My worthless self.

I knew from a long time ago that I was a very dependent person, I always needed some by my side.

I needed Her. Not Elsa anymore, I realize that now. For the past 2 years Her alway meant Elsa, but now it doesn't. Not anymore. Now it means Rapunzel, but I don't want that. That's not why I need her, that not why I want her. It's because I love her, and I know that it won't last forever, but right now it's all that it is.

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Heyy, ya it is I the author of dis book, and I just wanted to mention some things, as u can see we are now entering a deeper more intense part of the book, and my friend was complaining on how desperate Jack looks (is)
Ya he is desperate, I had mentioned this in the beginning of the book and it also in the tags that this will get stalkerish and desperate, and if u dont like that then u shud drop this book, because that the type of book this is, and if u enjoyed it so far I hope u still will keep on reading!! And I know I havnt been making long chapters like I use to, but I will try from now on!!!

Thank u for reading!!!!