Revived Souls

P A R T T h i r t y E i g h t

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|T H I R T Y e i g h t|our Revival
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Most of our lives, we have heard of a quite lot of people who did it. By 'it', I mean suicide; the heinous deed of killing oneself.

There's nothing as dangerous as our minds. We fight a lot of monsters in life but in reality, the biggest monsters live in our minds. It's funny when you think about it: as kids, you search for monsters under your bed and when you become mature, you realize that monsters are inside your head.

Back to suicide, the worst homicide a person could ever commit. A lot of us had thought about it at least once in lifetime presumably in teenage years when things could be so messed up that they can either build you or destroy you. I could understand the complexities of life as an adolescent because at that particular juncture, everything looked like a jigsaw puzzle. You would have the terrible feeling of loneliness invading your heart and sabotaging your friendships so that it could become your best friend. And once that happens, you would fall into the pit of endless depression.

Oh and depression; the clinical illness of numbness of emotions where the world felt like it was flipped upside down. Depression could be the worst place a person could ever end up in. Depression is a weapon that had the potency of killing every inch of emotions and filling your mind with morbid thoughts and ideas.

The equation was simple: desolation + loneliness + repression = Depression.

That was my equation at least even though I was no psychologist or a philosopher by profession. I was merely a person who have been screwed over and over by life. I had gone through it all; desolation, crumbling loneliness and deep repression of my thoughts which made me a depressive monk.

Throughout my adolescence, even though I levitated in a self created bubble of ignorant bliss against the world, loneliness had meddled in to my heart and it tore my soul piece by piece. I found Lennox in a lonely place of my life. That's why they always say: love when you are ready and not when you are lonely.

If I could divide my life, I would divide it as; life before Flynn and life after Flynn. My world did center around Flynn but I knew where to draw boundaries. He could be my soulmate but I was wise enough to keep a space in my heart for myself. I loved him but I did not forget to love myself too.

When most people decide to kill oneself, the world called them cowards as they were seen as cowering away from life in a sort of escape from the torture it presented. But what the world failed to understand was that even to escape life and face death, you needed a heck a lot of courage and fearlessness. Alas, this type of bravery would never be appreciated because destroying oneself was an unforgivable act. Nobody had the right of taking away their own life. It was unacceptable in the rule book of life.

I had found that existence of second chances were indeed true. No matter whatever hard stuff you go through, in the end, you would sail through it all. It was like desert rain; the desert may experience most of the dry and sunny climate for the rest of the year but once in a blue moon, it would rain. Happiness was as rare as that. A place may be undergoing a drought for sometime and all life forms would be dry but it doesn't take long enough for rain to pour down and restore all the beauty back again.

In my life, Flynn and Genie were the rain that revived my dried grass of a soul.

It took about another week before the court hearing was rescheduled for the coming Wednesday. I had a lot of bonding time with Genie and Flynn. The house was filled with a lot of noise and to be honest, I had never been more happier and excited in my life as much as I did now.