Innocent ✔️

Fifty

Author note: Oh my god guys! Already fifty! I feel like writing the first chapter was like yesterday.
Ps: it's a bonus update.

***

Anastasia's point of view

"And Jackson let you leave?" Jess asked, taking another sip of the red cup she had in her hand.

"He tried to stop me but couldn't." I said and bite my lip.

"I don't want you to get me wrong or think I'm saying this because I'm his friend and shit but leaving Jackson is something you should have never done." Nina said. "At least not here with Jonathan."

"Why everyone thinks he is a bad person? He is actually not and he is so sweet to me." I raised my voice a little but I guess it was unnecessary because it didn't really show my anger, it just showed that I was trying to yell over the music for her to hear me.

"You only see the part of people that they let you see. Maybe Jonathan is nice to you now but maybe he has something in mind and to archive it he has to start by being nice but in reality he is so far from being nice." Jess said.

"Well what you said only reminds me of Jackson." I said.

"Are you fucking kidding me? I'm not going to just stand there and defend Jackson because I am not a lawyer to his ass but you serious are so naive. Jackson already had what you think he wanted from you and he was crying his ass out because you left him so step back pretty lady and stop thinking with your ass. Jonathan isn't someone nice. If you trust him and if you showed him you don't, he will fuck you up." She yelled, throwing fits everywhere in the air before disappearing out of my view.

"I know Jess said it in a rude way but you have to trust her, Ana." Nina said with a sweet smile.

I don't know who to believe nor what to do. It wasn't like I don't love Jackson anymore and I'm on Jonathan's side now but even if I want to go back I wouldn't be able to. I just hope they aren't right about Jonathan. All I want is to have a life where I can sleep at night safe and that just seems like will never happen to me.

"He cheated on me. This just sounds like every romantic drama movie that the guy cheats on the girl and she gets hurt and leave him but it is true. It happens in real life." I told Nina.

"Jackson isn't someone who knows what to do to keep a girl by his side and not hurt her and for him, having sex with someone else to keep you wasn't something he thought will hurt you. He just didn't know." She tried to convince me.

"Maybe you're right but it doesn't hurt any less." I said and crossed my arms.

"He didn't mean to hurt you!"She said. "I'm not saying you should forget about it all and forgive him but it's not because he hurt you, which he didn't even mean to, then he doesn't love you. He does and he is ready to do anything to have you by his side. I've never seen Jackson so...alive until you came in the picture."

"With him, I'm nothing but hurt." I said.

"And him with you is doing nothing but trying to not hurt you." Nina said.

I loved the way she was talking so positive about him, it was like I needed this to make me think positively about him again. I love him and I know it, it is just so hard for me to take a step forward and regret it again.

"Ana I know it hurts but trust me, either way it will hurt. You just have to pick the pain you will enjoy and be able to deal with." She said, putting an end to our conversation about him.

Jackson's point of view

Knowing that she is by Jonathan's side just worry me so much more than it should. I probably think that every second of everyday but that was my only thought, the only thing I was thinking about. I know him and I know him with a girl means sex and fuck that I hate the thought of his hands on her, forced on her. What I imagined yesterday made my anxiety to grow even more. I wanted her to be okay and as much as I want to be by her side I would never want to see her hurt.

I sighed and threw my head back, looking at the diary that made me realize so many things that I couldn't see before. It made see everything she felt, everything she was hiding even if it was small. She made me see a weak part of her, a vulnerable part that she was able to hide it from me for an unknown reason for me. It made me live everything we lived together in another perspective. It also made me know about her mother and gave me a reason to understand why all this time she was acting weird. When she saw the women with a guy hitting her on the street. Her nightmares. It made me see why she hates Rose even though I lived it with her, reading what she wrote was like reading her thoughts and I loved it. I also saw how many time I hurt her even if it wasn't my intentions, how many times I made her depressed and lost, unsure of what she was doing. How many times I confused her but also saw how much she loved me and fuck that I would do anything to go back in time and change all the shit I did to make her smile when I made her cry, change the fucked up actions I did and make her happy but first of all, go back and do everything to make her stay here without touching another girl.

I sighed and leaned back on the bed, the hangover I have from yesterday's drinks was the worst so far. Despise how much of a fuck-up I am, I don't regret it, I would do it again if I went back in time. Staying sober and get hurt was the last thing I want. Regardless of the depressed thoughts I was having, when my phone vibrated next to me and Jess's name popped up, I accepted the call, put it on speaker and throw the phone next to me on the bed.

"Hey." She said through the phone.

"Hm?" I asked, re-reading the page of Ana's diary explaining how scared I made her, screaming at her when she was eavesdropping on me and Father.

"I just talked to Ana." She casually said, obeying my demand: call me and tell me how she is going.

"And?" I sat up and bought the phone to my ear, turning off the speaker mode.

"She is doing fine."

I frown, her voice made me feel that she is lying. I knew Jessica for a really long time and talking with this tone means that something is bothering her or she is hiding something from me and either one of them, I wanted to know what was up.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Nothing but yo she is fucked up." She said.

"No she isn't." I barked, defending Ana.

"Calm your shit, I'm just saying. She is too stubborn." She groaned.

"I know." I agreed.

"Anyways, I feel like she is doing everything to forget about you and she is using Jonathan to fill her brain." She said and my jaw clenched. The asshole is again messing with my shit but this time I won't hesitate to snap his head off his body.

"I would fucking beat the shit out of him if I was there." I said more to myself than to her.

"Then come." She said.

"Really?" I said in a are-you-fucking-serious tone.

"I mean he can't do shit because he is toping his pride and there is a full population is this god-damn place so I don't think he would rather do a scene, you know." She said, making my thoughts go wide. Plus you would want to see your little princess right there and knock some sense in her." She tried to convince me.

"You think so?" I asked, needing more arguments to make me want to be there even thought I knew seeing Ana was enough for me to do anything.

"Yeah. Plus he surprised you before in your own party so return the favor!" She said.

I took my lip ring between my teeth and nodded to myself, imagining Jonathan's angry face looking at me for appearing in his party pleased me and made me really want to see it.

"Okay." I softly said. "I'll be there."