I Hate Myself but I Love You

Chapter 55

Laura's POV

Mattie makes us sit in weirdly specific places (I was centimeters off and she forcefully moved me). Carmilla's to my left, Danny's on my right, and Mattie's across from me. We're seated on a circle one of them must have drawn with Perry/the Dean in the middle of it.

Mattie takes a dagger and slices her non-dominant hand. She dips her fingers from her other hand in the blood, curling her palm so that it doesn't fall to the ground. She draws a circle on her forehead and smears it on her cheeks. When Mattie passes it to Danny, I balk. Does she expect us to do that?

"Only do your cheeks." Mattie says.

Danny silently cuts her palm as well, flinching slightly. She spreads her blood across her cheeks. She passes the blade to me, and I hesitantly take it. I glance up to Mattie, who's watching me expectantly. Crap. Carmilla reaches over and positions it, reassuring me with her eyes that I'll be fine. I cut my non-dominant hand like I saw Mattie do and hiss at the pain. The blade passes easily through layers of my skin and I wrinkle my nose as the copper smell of my blood permeates the air. I dip my other thumb in the small red pool in my hand and smudge it on my cheeks. Carmilla gives me a reassuring smile as I pass it to her. She does the same and passes the dagger back to Mattie.

Mattie sets it down beside her and places her bloody palm in the smaller circle in front of her (how did I not notice that there are smaller circles in front of us within the big circle we're sitting on?). She gestures to us to do the same and we quickly comply.

"I will begin the spell soon. No matter how much pain you're in, you do not remove your hand. Do you understand? If you do, all of this was for nothing and the Dean will have permanent control of Perry. Do not move your hand." She makes eye contact with all of us (man I forget sometimes how intimidating she can be) and I shudder in relief when her gaze moves away from me.

Mattie starts speaking in an ancient sounding language, the words and their meanings escaping me. I can feel the power in them, and not just because the wind around us has picked up, swirling a foot behind our backs. I cast a fearful glance at Carmilla, who's already looking at me.

"Don't worry," she mouths.

I nod to show her I understand because saying anything would be useless. The wind is howling around us, but the words flowing from Mattie are still comprehensible. It's almost like the noise of the wind itself is bending around the words, allowing them to be heard. Mattie begins speaking faster and faster until I'm not sure if they're words or if she's humming. The miniature tornado around us comes closer until I can barely breathe with it whipping the air out of my lungs. My hand feels like it was injected with that painful poison that would've killed me. It aches, but feels like its burning. It feels like every cell in that hand is dying a slow, painful death. I grit my teeth and keep my palm down. I won't be the reason one of my friends dies.

The pain gets more intense until I'm practically doubled over and I can hear my teeth creaking with the force of my jaws. If I loosen up, I'll scream bloody murder and lift up my hand. The wind and the pain suddenly stop and I look up at Perry, who's blinking as if she hasn't seen the sun in a long time. Could this be Perry? Has it already worked?