polarize ~ tyler joseph fanfiction

Twenty Six

I gaze out the bus window, trying to ignore the bumps of the road jolting my body and making my stomach flip. Josh sits beside me, also looking out the window.

"Josh, you need to understand it's not Tyler's fault. In fact, it's not anyone's 'fault.'" I tell him, slightly turning to face him. "If two people like each other they should have free will to be in like. Or love. Example: Romeo and Juliet."

"You do know how that turned out, right?" Josh asks as he leans back in his chair.
I sigh, shaking my head. "Please talk to Tyler. You're tearing him apart."

Josh looks saddened by the thought of Tyler disoriented, but I can see by the emotions dancing through his eyes he feels compassion and disgust all at once.

"Maybe he should have thought twice before deciding to jump all over you. Does he even know about what happened to you that one night?" Josh asks, crossing his arms and glaring at me.

"No..." I trail off, not sure what to say. "I didn't feel the need to tell him." I explain, uncomfortable by the way Josh approached such a tense subject. Josh laughs at that, but I still can't seem to find any humor in this situation.

"What are you laughing at?" I ask, crossing my arms at him.

"At all of this." He tells me, throwing his arms in the air and letting them fall back down like he's given up.  "I never thought that I would actually be in a situation like this. It's crossed my mind, what if Tyler likes Oli? but never did I think you two would go behind my back like this!" He exclaims, curling his hands into fists. I was scared, when he was this upset it felt like someone just used their hand as a gun. It was so unusual to see him so bothered.

"You see how you're acting?" I demand, standing up and pushing my chair back so hard it topples backwards. "This is why we didn't tell you in the first place. We thought you would be a complete jerk if you found out and we were right!"

"Oh, I'm sorry that I'm upset that two people who meant the world to me just excluded me!" He said, his volume inclining.

"You could at least be a bit more positive!" I say, gesturing my arms towards him.

"That I could not. I'm done with you two, you expect me to be a loving older brother but all I really feel like is a third wheel." He jumps from his chair and stomps to the thin bus door, swinging it open and walking to an unknown destination.

I fall to the floor, resting my head in my hands and tucking my knees to my chest. I am hidden under a countertop, letting the darkness of its shadow soothe me.

"Olivia?" I hear Tyler whisper, his soft footsteps entering the room. I want to wrap my arms around him so bad but I feel so guilty of
what we've done to Josh. Josh just wants us to all be friends so nothing will be awkward.

Tyler's black vans stop in front of me and the silence ever so thickens the tense feeling. He bends down, resting his palms on his knees before sitting completely on the floor.

"I'm guessing you heard all of that?" I ask, not daring to lift my eyes.

"Olivia," He began.

"No, don't try to reassure me. I know exactly what happened. Josh was simply trying to make me feel better because of all the things that has happened to me recently and then me and you began to date and now he feels like the third wheel. There's the summary of our insane book."

Though I thought I could divert all speaking, Tyler still managed to find one fault in my speech.

"Things? As in plural?" He asks, crossing his legs in front of mine, his body still in the light of the room.

"Yes, other things happened Tyler. It's none of your business though." I inform him, my eyes fixed on the laces of his shoes.

"It is my business, I care about you. I want to know what has happened-"

"Stop!"

"Olivia, stop making things more complicated by bearing so much weight on your shoulders. You can trust me, I can help you carry that weight." He tells me in a soothing voice, leaning forward to grasp my hand. "Whatever it is, it won't change how I feel towards you."

"It's so embarrassing... It's so violating..." I explain vaguely, letting his fingers twist into mine.

"You can say it, no matter what it is, I support you."

"Remember the um, the night I went missing? That concert?" I ask, slightly bringing my eyes up just enough to see his elbows on his knees.

"Yeah, I remember that night clearly."

"Well, I went missing because I was thrown out. Some doofus of a guard didn't know I travel with you guys and threw me outside." My body shivers as I replay the events in my head. Horrifying, terrifying. Horrible, terrible. "Out side in the alley was some guy, but I-I couldn't see his face. He got closer to me and he... he violated me in a way I can't say." I finally manage to say, tears filling my eyes and my body racking with fear.

Tyler launches forward, engulfing me in a warm hug. My head rests on his chest as I sob, his strong arms creating a barrier from me and the outside world.

"T-Tyler," I say through my tears and hiccups, "I was raped." As if it wasn't obvious enough.
He soothes me, running my back even as I seize and writhe, his calming voice lulling me into a safe place called my dreams.

well.
I love you guys. ❤️
as I'm over reading this,
it kind of relates to the song unsteady
by x ambassadors