polarize ~ tyler joseph fanfiction

Thirty Three

I waited for the show to end, standing in the lonely tour bus kitchen. The hotel was much more comfortable, but we had to gather our things and load up the bus to travel through the night.

The skinny door flew open and the two boys tumbled in, sweat rolling down their foreheads, Josh's shoulders glistening and Tyler's neck paint splotchy.

"Josh, would you mind leaving the room?" I request, examining a slice of apple before popping it in my mouth. He nods, fully understanding what I was about to proceed with.

"Tyler, who is Jenna?" I politely ask, my hands clasped on the cutting board filled with little apple slices.

He seems surprised, his eyes widening just the slightest. "No one to worry about." He quickly informs me, attempting to dodge my question.

"Tell me." I say with a sigh, "I have no energy to argue with you." I inform him, looking at him with my head tilted upwards.

"She's someone that I used to know." He tells me with a shrug, crossing his arms uncomfortably.

I vaguely understand who she is, an ex-girlfriend who had his heart but something happened, but it hurts he won't tell me about her. I get this is uncomfortable- to tell your new lover about an old one?

Something snaps inside of me, like the little elevator wire that was holding onto me just broke and let me fall. I shake my head and stomp out of the room, not prepared for the lies Tyler was ready to offer.

I quickly walk away from him, shutting the bunk door to close him off from me and Josh.

"He won't tell me who Jenna is." I say, crossing my arms and sliding down the cold door.

"Oli," Josh says with a chuckle, shaking his head, "Tyler isn't exactly a ladies man, he's only loved one woman before you and now the second one he's loved is asking about the first."

"I'm runner up." I say lazily, rolling my head to the side. "The second one, the replacement." I vulnerably tell Josh. Though I know this might be awkward for him to talk with me about my dating life, especially since it's with his best friend, he'll still comfort me.

"Or you're stronger." Josh tells me.

"If I'm stronger, why am I in second place?"

"This isn't a race, Oli. The fact is that you two are dating and he is just unused to talking about someone he previously knew extremely personally." Josh tells me, his voice icing over as if he's determined to brighten me up. "You are Tyler's girlfriend and you're a keeper to him, so don't give up on him after this one incident."

I sigh, my thoughts clearly changed from Josh's perspective. "Okay..." I say quietly, carefully standing up and making my way to my bunk, "I need rest."
~~~
"Olivia," A soft voice whispers as a light hand rubs my hip, slightly shaking my body. "Olivia," It repeats, forcing me to roll over and lazily open my weary eyes.

"What?" I ask groggily.

"Can I show you something?" Tyler asks, his hand resting on my hip, sending light shivers up my spine. Though I'm annoyed with him, the touch enlightens me.

"It's the middle of the night." I complain, rolling on my stomach, his hand falling away.

"I can't sleep, so I wanna show you something." He tells me.

I groan quietly, careful to not wake Josh. Nearly falling out of bed, Tyler helps me stand up and wraps a strong arm around my waist to support me.

He leads me to the living room, showing me to the couch. I plop down and let the sofa engulf me as he leans over and turns on the TV.

"Are we really going to watch a movie?" I ask him, crossing my arms.

"Well, that would be better than watching a slideshow of me and Jenna." He says.

"Really? You can't tell me about your ex so you decide to just shove pictures of you two in my face?" I exclaim, my voice and anger rising competitively.

"Olivia, I'm trying here-"

"Well, you're doing a really bad job! Right when Josh convinced me to forgive you, you mess it all up again!" I practically yell, my words obviously striking him on a deep
level. "This whole tour is just a mess." I say, throwing my arms in the air.

"How?" Tyler whispers, his eyes settled on the ground.

"First, I haven't even gotten to completely grieve for my father because you guys just won't let me think about him. Second, I sprained my wrist because of you. Third, I was violated! And fourth, I fell in love." I say in a rush, the captivating word, love, falling out before I could catch it.

Tyler says nothing and the silence irks me as he twitches.

"Just tell me about Jenna." I demand, sitting back down by him.

"Maybe not right now." He says quietly, standing up and heading to the door.

"Tyler." I say, crossing my arms. "Stop." He keeps his head forward and places his hand on the door, ready to swiftly escape.

I jump from my seat and cross the room, capping my hand over where the door and the wall meet.

"I don't want to hurt you." He says, looking at my hand. "Please, just let me go." In this simple sentence I can see that he is talking about much more than injuring my hand... he wants to leave, probably walk off all his worries only to come back with double. He wants to just leave me in peace.

"Tyler," I say, wrapping my other hand around his elbow. "Don't you dare leave."

"I'm not going to hurt you, I'm going to find out a way to fix this. Let me go." He says, swiftly removing my hand from the wall and swinging open the door.

He runs down the thin steps, the cold night air
entering the bus.

"Tyler, the bus will leave soon-" I begin, quickly rushing after him. "Tyler!" I cry, chasing after his fast-paced figure. "You doing this only hurts me more!"

He stops in his tracks, turning around with notable tears in his eyes.

"Please, don't hurt." He says, turning back around and blending in with the shadows.

Salty tears roll down my face, softening my lips and wetting my chin.

"Tyler..." I whisper, letting my self collapse onto the pavement. "Come back soon." I say into the darkness with hope.