ARIA'S POV
I was fast asleep, escaped from my mind, escaped from reality. The only place I could be without wanting to hurt myself. The only place I could dream without thinking it was unrealistic.
The only place I could be happy.
I loved sleeping. Not because I was some teenager that had a lack of sleep due to stress and school. Not because I was tired from partying all night long. Yes indeed, I was tired. But it's the kind of tired that sleep won't fix. I was dreaming peacefully about being healthy, having a family, having a job, untill I was brutally ripped from my imagination by Ezra.
"Aria, wake up" he wishpered. I didn't react. I wanted to drift away, back to my perfect dream. "Aria, there's someone here for you" Ezra wishpered and now my eyes shot open. Fear was the only thing I felt. He couldn't have done this, could he? I wasn't that sick. In fact I wasn't sick at all. I was only smart enough to realize I'm not made for this world, and I have to die. Why not now? Why not call the shots myself?
Suddenly I felt two strong arms wrap around me and I was being carried to the living room. Ezra layed me down on the couch, and somewhere far away, in a really blurry sound I could hear a women talking. I didn't bother to look up though, I really didn't care who she was and why she was here. Probably to help me, to help me get out of this so called 'sick mental state.' I had to admit I was curious to see what she was gonna try, I had to see how far she would go untill she would realize I was lost energy, because I only see one way out at this moment.
Death.
And maybe the most frightening part about all of this is that I am not scared by the thought of that. It was reassuring to me that I knew I would see my parents back, and to get out of this place.
"Aria! Stop shutting us out, we're here to help you! Stop staring at that wall!" I suddenly heard Ezra say with desperation all over his voice. Funny how he still thinks I'm shutting him out when I'm just preventing him to get into this mess what I have to call life.
"Aria dear, I can help you. I really can. But you have to let go of that wall and start talking, you have to let us in" The women spoke. How rude of her, she didn't even introduce herself. I'm probably not even worth a hello. It was silent after that for a while. No one dared to speak.
"Aria, please" Ezra begged and I could hear his voice almost cracking. I ripped my eyes of that white wall and turned around to face him and the women. Tall, blonde, glasses, middle aged, nice suit, white tablet. Definately a therapist.
"Why would I" I spoke with no emotion in my voice. I didn't care anymore. Sooner or later I would be gone from this fucked up planet.
"Because we care about you, and we like to see you happy" The women spoke with a little smile plastered on her face. Ugh, not the time to be happy.
"You don't care about me at all. You don't even know me. All you care about is your money, otherwise you wouldn't sit in this room trying to 'help me,' how you like to call it" I spoke and the women was a little taken aback by that comment.
"Do it for me, please" Ezra asked but I shook my head.
"I'm sorry mate, I'm lost hope. Not a single possibility" I said and I saw the hope in Ezra's eyes vanishing with every word I spoke. It hurt me to see him like this, but I was only preparing him for when the real burden comes. When I'm gone.
"Okay. Okay, I'm letting you go. Do whatever you want to do. Kill yourself, hurt yourself. Go ahead, I won't stop you" Ezra said and threw his blanket away.
"Okay" I said, stood up and walked to the door.
"Stop! Don't go! He isn't serious!" The women said, grabbed my arm and dragged me to the couch. I looked at Ezra who had just burried his head in his hands, but I saw a single tear fall onto his washed jeans.
"Why? He doesn't care about me anyways" I asked and suddenly Ezra's head shot up. Something in him snapped.
"I don't care about you? I don't care about you?!" He said on a scary tone and started to raise his voice. "If there's someone here who cares about you it's fucking me! It was me who dragged you all the way to hospital, it was me who took care of you when you couldn't take care of yourself, it was me who tried to help you when you were lost, and it is me who doesn't know what to do anymore!" Ezra yelled. "Why can't you see Aria?! I love you, I fucking love you with my whole heart! You are the girl I want to safe, you are the one I want to hold in my arms, and you are the one I can't let go! Can't you fucking see that?!" Ezra said and broke down in tears. I couldn't believe him. I really couldn't believe him. He couldn't love me, no one does. Everyone will leave me here eventually, they will give me lost hope and when times get rough they will let me sink while they have enough space in their boat. It's just too much effort to pull me in.
"Do you hear that Aria? He loves you, he really does" The women said. I don't know what kind of education this thing has had but her words aren't helpful at all. Of course I heard him, he just admitted his feelings towards me.
"Don't" I begged
"We're only trying to help you Aria"
"Don't love me. It's not worth it. I'm a time bomb, I will explode, I will crash, I will kill myself. Besides that, I can't love you. I can't give you what you need. I have to love myself before I can love anyone else" I said and turned around again. It was true, I can't love untill I love myself. I can't handle that kind of commitment.
"But you are gonna love yourself, you are gonna see what a beautiful, young lady you are" the women spoke which made my smile. Probably just some common words she says to everyone.
"But what if I can. What if I can do this. I'll never have my fresh start. This will always haunt me" I questioned
"In the end, it'll make you to the person you're gonna become. You can do this. I promise"
~
EZRA'S POV
It was a day. A long, exhausting day. I was looking at Aria who had fallen asleep minutes after Natalia left. I admitted my feelings to her, god how could I be so stupid. She was probably feeling forced into something she can't do now. I hate myself for that, I don't want to hurt the girl any more. I was tired, exhausted actually so I walked into my bedroom and dropped myself on the bed to fall into a long, peaceful sleep. Just before I drifted away, I felt the blanket on the other side of the bed being lifted up and a warm, petite body curling up against my body. She wrapped her arms around my waist and snuggled her head into my chest.
"I love you, Aria Montgomery"
A/N
OKAY I TRIED TO WRITE IN ARIA'S POV I HOPE YOU LIKE IT. IT WAS TOUGH, BUT I TRIED MY BEST! THAT BOAT 'QUOTE' IS FROM MYSELF THAT'S WHY IT ISN'T THAT GOOD BUT YEAH GOOD ENOUGH THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE HAHA ILY
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Black Roses (Ezria)
Fanfiction"Cause we're young and we're reckless, we'll take this way to far" "It'll leave you breathless, or with a nasty scar" This is not your average love story. This is not a story about a young, perky teenager. This is not a story about a teenager who...
