16 - Give A Cheer For All The Broken

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Cole POV
Ava's room looked great. We just finished putting furniture in it. Mikey stared at me lovingly.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked, slightly nervous. Even though we were married, it still gave me butterflies when he looked at me a certain way or told me he loved me.

"Because you're beautiful." He said, making me blush. "You're blushing."

"Yeah, so?"

"It's cute." He said. He kissed me passionately. "I love you."

"I love you, too." I said. Mikey pulled put his phone.

"I didn't get a picture of Ava yet this week." He said. I smiled and pulled my shirt up, showing my baby bump. Mikey took a picture and smiled.

"Cole, are you okay?" Mikey asked, sitting next to me on the couch.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I replied, quietly. I had been overthinking everything for the past few days. No one said anything because I've been wearing the all-to-famous Mikey Way poker face.

"Cole, I know you're lying to me. What's wrong?" I broke down crying.

"I'm just-I'm terrified. I-I just want her to be okay and I don't want anything to happen to her. I'm terrified that something's going to happen to her, and I won't be able to do anything about it. I-I'm terrified that Sarah or my dad is going to come back here and do something to her. I'm terrified that someone is going to take her away from me. In terrified that she's going to die before she's even born. I'm terrified to be a mother, I'm terrified to not be a mother. She just-she has to be okay. Ava has to be okay. Nothing can happen to her."

"She is going to be fine. Ava is going to be fine. Nothing bad is going to happen to her." Mikey said, reassuringly.

"What if I'm like Sarah?" I asked.

"You won't be."

"How can you know that?"

"Because you'll make sure you're not. You know how shitty your life was with Sarah. I know you don't want that for Ava." Mikey said. I leaned over and kissed him passionately.

"How do you always know the right thing to say?" I asked.

"I'm like a spiritual advisor." That made me laugh. I shifted so we were cuddling. He put a blanket over us. I closed my eyes.

Sleep could not have come quicker.

--------------------

I woke up the next morning, secure in Mikey's arms. I had felt better since we talked last night.

Mikey was right: my life was shitty with Sarah and my dad. I will do everything to make sure Ava doesn't have to go through that. She's my baby.

I know it wont be easy for her, having Mikey gone a lot on tour. If I could barely handle him gone for a year, I don't know how we're going to deal with it in the future. But, we'll have Cassie and Payton to be around.

Despite the gender difference, Cassie and I are planning on Ava and Payton being friends. They'll understand how each other feels--with their dads being gone for months at-a-time. And they're close in age, so they should get along.

Is it weird to have your child's future somewhat planned out, when they're only twenty one weeks old--and not even born yet?

Yeah, probably.

But, normalcy isn't our thing.

XoXo

~XhannahX

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