October 24, 2011
Dear Diary,
Guilt. It isn't a thing I like feeling. I don't like doing guilty things or feeling it. It's just not a thing I like.
Most people are guilty over people they think they caused terrible, torturous pain towards, others just little simple things like taking an extra cookie from the jar. My guilt is from my life.
I sometimes think and feel that there is so much I can and should do to others. I should help or volunteer the less fortunate. I should try and be a better person towards others when I am naturally and want to improve. I should try new things instead of just putting them down and saying "Maybe next year".
I cry and cry hoping, just hoping, that a change will accur. A new reaction will aligned in my path. That a new beginning for me will come amongst me and I won't turn it down.
Until I experience that, hope is all I have.
Do people stop and wonder would it be different if they took that opportunity? That if they were given a trip of a lifetime should they have turned it down and later regret that they should of gone? That's exactly how I am, right now. In my head the word is calming and soothing, but when I add "not" to the equation, things just get a hell of a more complicated.
I don't like it when people try and force you into something you know for sure you don't want to do. But the more I think about it, the more it hurts me. I hate disappointment towards others and myself, and I just can't stand the lack of enthusiasm I give towards others.
Sure I have my grand moements, but I'm pretty sure I ain't the only one out there . . .
Guilty Love,
Darla
YOU ARE READING
The REAL Diary of a Highschooler: Freshmen Year 2011-12
Short StoryMy life . . . lonley is what it is. Sometimes I don't feel like I am, but then again it's most of the time I do feel lonesome. Lonesome because I am lost, and lost because theres no hope left, and no hope left because I am vanishing. Most high schoo...
