Happy Hope (Book Two)

Chapter 16:

            “Don’t go,” Amelia said immediately after she read the letter. I looked at her puzzled, with my eyebrows drawing together.

            “But I want to.”

            “Please, don’t go,” she repeated.

            “Why not?”

            “Just because he wrote about how much he loves you doesn’t mean you should give him another chance,” Amelia argued waving the letter at me. “He still did what he did.”

            “And he’s explained what has happened.”

            “Oh so if Matt and Daniella had a reason for taking you to that abortion centre are you going to forgive them?”

            “No,” I answered immediately but Louis was different. He made me feel something I didn’t think I could ever feel again. Sure, he broke my heart but wasn’t the point that he became so important to me that he could break my heart? And if someone was so important that they could break your heart isn’t that a sign you should keep hold of them? Love can make you feel a horizon of different emotions from happiness that makes you feel dizzy, to despair, to rage, to hate but wasn’t the point that that one person could make you feel like that? In all the books I’ve read the couple didn’t get the happy ending until they were put under a test. A test that caused them rage, hurt or hate. But they made it through and became the happy couple riding off into the sunset. Maybe this was our test.

It was still ten days to go before the Taylor Swift concert and Amelia was doing everything in her power to try and stop me. Making snarky comments about Louis, pointing out that he could be lying, pointing out that he lied. The thing was that all this had occurred to me, plenty of times right before I fell asleep when your mind is the most vulnerable and when those thoughts made themselves present my sleepy mind reminded me of the time he built a tree house with Connor, of the time we talked on a jumping castle, of all the times he made me laugh uncontrollably and of all the times he made me feel like I was the queen of the world. My mind reminded me of all these things and my languid mind decided that the pain was worth the good times so it plastered a drowsy smile on my face and I fell to sleep with a smile on my face every night just thinking of Louis.

            “Mummy, where’s Louis?” Sophie asked plopping down next to me on mum’s comfy armchair that was big enough to fit both of us. I looked down at her smiling and wrapping my arm around her tiny body hoisting her onto my lap.

            “He’s been busy working, honey. You’ll see him soon. I promise.”

            “Then he’ll be gone again,” I heard Amelia huff under her breath.

            “Amelia,” I warned giving her an icy glare.

            “What? He’s just going to break you again and then I’ll have to put you back together.”

            “I don’t think so,” I murmured. Between Louis’s letter and what Perrie told me I was convinced that this would work out. Please let it work out, I would think to myself, it needs to.

            “Yiayia’s napping,” I heard mum say to someone at the door. I looked at Amelia and she mouthed ‘Matt’. I rolled my eyes telling Sophie to go play with Connor in the yard.

            “Is that good?” I heard Matt’s worried voice ask.

            “I guess,” mum said as they walked into the living room. “She’s resting and I guess that helps her but as the weeks pass she takes longer naps and I’m not sure it’s a good sign that she needs so much sleep.”