Happy Hope (Book Two)

Chapter 25:

Today I received flowers. They were big, a very expensive looking arrangement with lilies and roses, peonies and tulips, crystal blancas and lilacs and hyacinths. Pink, white and green. They were in a fish bowl type of vase. They were beautiful, the fragrance was beautiful.

            “Well are you going to take them?” the Asian guy asked looking bored. I was holding the door open with my mouth gaping open. Amelia appeared and grabbed them off the guy.

            “Thanks,” she said quickly as she walked back into the house. “There’s a card!”

            “Hey those are mine!” I complained as she took the card.

            “Hope,” she read out. “I can’t explain to you how much I miss you. I wish you were here. I miss the kids too. I’m sorry for lying and I’m sorry for being involved in the accident. I’m sorry for being the reason the accident occurred. I’m sorry I caused you so much pain. I love you always. Louis.”

            “Thanks Amelia, for invading my personal privacy,” I said sarcastically.

            “Like I wouldn’t have read it anyways,” she rolled her eyes, “So what are you going to do?”

            “A big vase of flowers and a note isn’t going to change much,” I told her walking to my bedroom to read so I could get my mind off of Louis. I had decided to start the Mortal Instrument series a few days before and I sat on my bed with a highlighter at the ready to highlight any good quotes. I was already halfway through the book.

As I read I found myself constantly having to re-read paragraphs because I would read but my mind would be focusing on Louis so the words I was reading were like background noise. A distant hum of noise whilst Louis was blaring in my thoughts.

I wanted to hate him. I should hate him but I didn’t. Amelia was right I didn’t only lose Jake in that accident. I lost Anna too. The grave that was next to Jake’s but I blankly ignored because it was too much to know she was six feet under. Jake was one thing, but Anna, dead. I’d never been able to handle that so I pretended she never existed. And it became easier and easier as time went on but I couldn’t do it anymore so I put my book on the side table and wept like a child.

.

Jade wanted to talk so we know sat outside at my outdoor glass table and matching chairs set with two cups of coffee. I admired her dark tone of skin, my skin didn’t even get close to that colour unless I spent a few months in Greece.

            “Perrie wishes you had decided to go on tour with them,” Jade started the conversation taking a sip of coffee.

            “I just couldn’t,” I said closing my eyes and breathing deeply. “There’s something you don’t understand. I can’t just forgive him.”

            “Why not?”

            “Because he was my husband! I loved him so much and after he died I was never the same until Louis came.”

            “Butt if Louis fixed you isn’t that debt paid?” Jade asked. Debt paid? I asked myself and I laughed.

            “No!” I said. “I lost two people in that accident! And they’ll never come back! We were meant to be a family!”

            “Two people?” Jade asked confused cocking her head. I sighed.

            “I’ll be back in two seconds,” I told her, I scraped the chair against the concrete as I pushed it back to get up. I strolled into the house bunching up my black maxi skirt so I wouldn’t trip.