The Party Scene Saga: Stories Yet To Unfold

Part 28

"Lily...wake up." a voice murmured.

My eyes snapped open; I almost died of shock. I could still see the trails down his face where he'd be crying and the skin around his eyes was red raw.

"S-say something." he pleaded.

I paused for a second. "Go home, Zack." I croaked.

"But we nee-"

"Go home, Zack." I repeated a little louder.

"You better go, but thanks anyway." a voice grumbled; Lisa.

I noticed the window was wide open, but only after Zack climbed out of it. There was no way on earth Lisa's parents would have let him in, so it had to be the window. I was annoyed with Lisa for bringing him here, but it was too early for arguments.

"Look I know you're annoyed," she said quickly, resting on the edge of the bed. "But Zack did nothing wrong! He feels just as shitty as you do right now and you need to keep a relationship with him!"

"But it hurts." I choked out.

"What?"

I sniffled. "It hurts to even think about Zack right now." I mumbled. "He's too involved with...them."

"Lily..." she whined.

"I'm sorry Lisa but I'm just not ready yet."

She nodded slowly and crawled back under the covers next to me. "I understand ." she soothed, hugging me. "But when you're ready, just say the word and I'll get Zack to come talk to you okay?"

I nodded. Like hell I want to talk to Zack. But making promises I knew wasn't going to keep was a speciality of mine, and I had no intention of changing that any time soon.

"Mom said I can stay off school today." she said quietly. "That is, if you aren't going."

"No offence or anything Lis," I replied just as quiet. "But I don't need a babysitter."

"We just thou-"

"I know you're just trying to look out for me," I interrupted. "But...I just need some time by myself. Your mom told me she'll be here all day and I know where everything is, so you just go. Seriously, just go."

"You promise you'll be fine?" She asked quietly, biting her lip.

"I promise." I nodded. "Now go. It'll look suspicious if both of us aren't in today."

I heard Lisa shout a brief goodbye to everybody and the front door slam shut as she left. Within minutes I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and immediately slammed my eyes shut. I was in no mood for talking to any of Lisa's family at this hour of the morning. I heard the door open and then slam against the wall, like someone had thrown it open.

"Good morning, Miss Merrick." a voice cheered; a voice I wasn't expecting.

"Alex?!" I exclaimed, sitting up.

Sure enough, there was Alex stood in the doorway. Rian, Kara and Lisa too. They all piled in and collapsed on top of me, hugging me tightly. Everyone sat up and Alex was right next to me, still hugging me.

"We heard." he told me quietly. "Lily I'm sor-"

"Don't." I interrupted. "I never want to hear that word again."

"I know you told me to go, but Alex and Kara got worried when Rian said you never got the bus." gushed Lisa.

"Lis, it's fine." I giggled. "You're all here now, it's okay. I have my best friends around me and that's all I need."

"What about Jack?" Kara asked innocently.

While Rian turned his attention to an interesting patch of the floor, and Alex loosened his grip on me slightly, and Lisa glared at Kara, I brought my knees up to my chin and wrapped my arms around them. It wasn't Kara's fault; she just thought he might be able to make me smile.

"Well..." I muttered. "I kinda don't want to see Jack either right now. Zack asked me a really weird question yesterday morning. I still don't know what to make of it."

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Alex and Rian sharing the same look. A look that told me something was going on that I didn't like.

"I took my bong out on the roof the night before they told us and I fell asleep out there. Zack woke me up the next morning and we were just talking. Then, for some reason he asked me if I still loved Jack." My voice just kept getting quieter. "I...I don't know what to make of it. Have you guys heard anything?"

"Not a thing." Kara said honestly.

"Nope." said Lisa shaking her head.

The boys simply shook their heads, which made me think they knew something. But right now, I was in such a shitty mood I didn't even care about Jack. In fact, I didn't care about anything. So much so, that my urges were coming back. Almost instantly, I started scratching the top of my foot; a habit I'd gotten into when Zack came home. My right foot was red raw already and I knew I was on the verge of breaking the skin but I kept going anyway. Kara followed my hand and saw the the bright red patch on my foot, and I could've sworn she was tearing up.

"Guys you don't need to stay with me." I half-laughed. "I'll be fine. Honestly."

"We want to." pouted Alex. "To be honest, Jack'll be an asshole today because you're not there. We're saving your skin here."

"If you say so..." I sighed.

The rest of the day was filled with laughter and fun - from the others anyway. I smiled weakly and chuckled a little just so I looked involved, but I just wanted to be alone. At around 12, Cindy brought up a huge plate of food for all of us, and assured she'd keep our hiding place a secret. Kara and Cindy suddenly broke into discussion, which I took as a cue to slip out. I could still hear their sickening laughter all the way from the bathroom, even with the door shut. The shiny, sharp object I'd hidden in the hole in the wall behind the bathroom mirror was out of its hiding place and sat in my hand in no time. It felt so good, the coldness resting against my palm. Before I even realised, it was brushing my skin and I was about to press down harder when the door flew open. Kara came in.

"Kara please..." I said weakly. "Please just leave me alone."

"I just want to understand." she sobbed. "I want to understand why you feel the need to do this to yourself. It's not just you affected by this, it's everybody. Your friends and your family, and even your friends parents! My mom worries about you so much. Every time you leave my house, she says 'One day she'll leave this house and she'll actually be happy'. She can't wait for the day when her attempts to cheer you up actually work. My mom tries so fucking hard to make you really smile, Lily, and it hurts her knowing that you're not happy. All of us want to understand, and we want to help you! You just need to let us in."

I couldn't speak. As close as me and Kara are, we've never had a conversation like that before. I knew she often worried about me, but this was something else. Before I even realised, she had my razor in her hand. I raised my eyebrow at her, but she just shook her head and threw it out the window. She held out a hand and led me back to Lisa's room, and I actually felt like I was enjoying myself for once. Even if I was feeling shit on the inside.