They Don't Know About Us

Somewhat of a Date

I got out of the car and looked down at my ankle. It was starting to swell up. I can't let anyone see this. It will be fine, I'm sure that nothing bad will happen to my ankle. I just have to prevent myself from limping, or they will find out.

I walked towards the door, trying to not let the pain show through my facial features. I opened up the door and walked into the house.

When I walked in, I could see that Zayn and Rachel were sitting on the couch.

"Hey, we have good news," Zayn told me, motioning me to walk over to him. I walked over to him and Rachel, "What is it?" I asked them.

"We found a name for the baby," Zayn told me.

"It only took us a couple months, but we did it," Rachel said. I could see that her stomach was much bigger now, because she was seven months pregnant.

"What's his name?" I asked.

"Mason," Zayn replied, smiling about having his own son.

"How'd you choose the name?" I asked, curiously.

"Well, I wanted the name Jason and Zayn wanted the name Max, so we just combined them," Rachel replied. I frowned, "Really?"

"No, I just made that up," Rachel replied.

"Well, it's a cute name," I replied, "I'll be back in a little, I have homework to do."

I walked back up to my room, and shut the door behind me. Time to do the usual ritual before anyone notices. I tossed my book bag on top of my bed, and headed over to my bathroom. I walked in, and locked the door behind me. I reached in the shower rack and grabbed my razor. I looked at the blade before immediately starting.

I rolled up my sleeve, and looked at the cuts from today. They had mostly dried and now it's time to create brand new ones. I pressed my blade against the bare skin on my arm and slid it to the right. I watched the blood slowly rise out of the cut, brimming at the top before spilling over. I repeated the process until five new cuts covered my arm. Good enough for now.

I set the razor back on the shower rack and cleaned off the cuts. I covered them up and rolled my sleeve back down my arm. I walked back to my bedroom and started on my homework.

After about fifteen minutes, I heard someone opening up my bedroom door. I looked up from my work to see Niall in the doorway. He smiled when our eyes locked. Niall broke the gaze for a minute to sit beside me on the bed.

"I was thinking that we could go somewhere this weekend," Niall told me, "The weather is supposed to be nicer then usual."

I put on a fake smile, "That sounds great. I'm looking forward to it.

*


The rest of the week had slowly passed by. It was all a mess of insults, cutting, beatings, staring, avoiding, and hiding away from life. I try to avoid everyone, and put on a fake smile at home. I can't let them find out. That would kill me. They would be devastated, and take me out of college. I need to be there, it will definitely help me career-wise. Besides, I'm pretty sure some people have had it worse.

It was now Saturday morning, and Niall wanted to go on a date with me. I guess that will be nice. I hope nothing goes wrong.

I pulled myself out of bed and then took a nice long shower. Once the shower was done, I decided to let out some of the pain before doing anything. This will help me go through the day, and not breakdown in front of Niall.

I cleaned up the four new cuts I've created and then got ready. I dried my hair and then left my hair in loose curls. I put on a pair of floral pants and a maroon jumper. I put on some jewelry, a hat, and a pair of TOMS. I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked at how much makeup I had put over my face to cover up. I look so fake, so ugly.

I lifted up my shirt for a moment, looking at my stomach. I saw the scars, and I saw my stomach in general. I look hideous, ugly, fat. I need to stop eating so much, then maybe I can be pretty. Then maybe people will finally like me. I don't know what else to do anymore.

I let my shirt fall back down, covering my stomach. I covered my face with my hands for a moment, and let a few tears fall. Soon, I was sobbing. Why does this have to happen to me?

I finally stopped, when I realized that I needed to leave with Niall. I looked at myself in the mirror to see that all my makeup had been smeared, so I quickly washed it off and reapplied it. That's somewhat better.

I walked downstairs to see that Niall was all ready. He smiled when he saw me, and joined me by my side, "Ready to go?" He asked. I nodded, "Yeah, I just need to get my coat on. I grabbed my coat and threw it over my shoulders.

"Ready," I told him. Niall wrapped his arm around my shoulder, and led me out the door. We got into his car, and I sat in the passenger's seat. Niall started up the car and pulled it out of the driveway. I was silent, as Niall drove down the road. I stared out the window, not sure what to say.

"You okay?" Niall asked me. I quickly snapped my head up, "Yeah, I'm fine, why do you ask?"

"You're just really quiet," Niall replied.

"Sorry, I was just sort of distracted," I replied, trying to make myself more cheerful. Niall continued driving, and I let the car remain silent. I'm worried that if I talk I'll slip up, or end up sounding like an idiot. That's what I am to everyone else. I don't want Niall to think that either. He's all I have.

"We're here," Niall announced, as he parked the car, "I decided we should just go walking, since it's so nice outside."

I saw Niall pull his hood up, covering his hair, and put on a pair of sunglasses, even though it was January. I got out of the car, along with Niall. He grabbed my hand, and walked with me along the sidewalk.

"I was thinking we could go out to eat for lunch, somewhere downtown," Niall said. I nodded, "That sounds good," I replied. No, this is horrible. I don't want to eat too much, and look fat. I can just order a salad or something.

We walked along the street, making small talk. I was barely saying anything, I was scared to open up to my own boyfriend. What has happened to me?

Suddenly, I saw someone walking on the opposite side of the sidewalk. He stared at me, then smirked. This is bad, really bad. I know who he is. That's one of the bullies in my school. I quickly let my gaze fall to the ground. Niall continued holding onto my hand, and talking. I had stopped listening to Niall, and was trying to avoid the guy.

Suddenly, he stuck his foot out, without me noticing. That caused me to fall to the ground, Niall still holding onto my hand. Niall quickly helped me back up.

"Are you okay?" He asked, frantically. I nodded, as I stood up, "Yeah, I'm fine," repeating my most common lie.

"What happened?" He asked, confused. I guess Niall didn't see the guy trip me.

"O-Oh, I just tripped over that one guy's foot on accident," I answered.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Niall asked, his voice softening. I nodded again, and Niall dropped the subject.

We walked for about an hour, and it was now around noon. I was dreading this. I didn't want to eat anything, but I know I'll have to if I want to keep my secret.

"Wanna go get something to eat?" Niall asked. I weakly nodded, "Sure," I mumbled in reply. Niall led me over to a small Italian restaurant. We opened up the door for me, and allowed me to walk in. There were mostly only older people here, so Niall took off his sunglasses and pushed off his hood.

We were given a table, and sat down. Niall sat across from me, talking about something that I wasn't really paying much attention to. I would once and a while agree with what he was saying, but wouldn't put in much input.

Finally the waiter came over. Niall ordered a large meal like he usually does.

"What would you like?" The waiter asked me. I searched the menu one last time, "Um, I'll have a salad."

Niall frowned, "That's all?"

"U-Um, yeah," I answered, my voice soft. Niall frowned again, "Aren't you hungry?" He asked. I shook my head, "Not really..." I mumbled. Niall shrugged, and then allowed me to order that. Does he now know? Did I ruin everything by saying that.

"Um, I'm going to go to the bathroom, be back in a minute," I told him, as I stood up. Niall nodded, allowing me to leave the table. I made my way over to the back of the restaurant, where the bathroom was. I quickly walked in, and locked myself in one of the stalls. I noticed that there were other people in the bathroom, so I have to be silent. I pulled the pencil sharpener out of my pocket. I decided that this was the smallest blade I can bring, and no one would notice that it's bad.

I rolled up my sleeve, and let the blade slide across my skin. I watched the blood spill over. I created three more cuts. I quickly used toilet paper to clean off the blood. I wrapped it around my cuts, and then rolled my sleeve back down. I then flushed the toilet, so it didn't seem like I was cutting. I walked out of the bathroom, making a bad mistake.

"Look who it is! The school whore!" I bit my lip when I realized who I had ran into. It was two girls. Two bullies that went to my college.

"Is she on a date with her 'boyfriend'?" She asked, putting quotes around boyfriend, "That's hard to believe that he is in love with sluts."

"I can't believe you'd actually go here," The other girl said, "You're already fat enough. Why would you go to a restaurant to eat? You'll get even more fat!"

I tried to push past them, so I could leave without getting into any more problems. One of them grabbed my arm and spun me back around. Her hand came in contact with my face. I felt a stinging sensation erupt on my cheek, because of the slap.

"Don't you dare walk away from us, bitch," She growled at me. I cowered back, until my back hit the wall. She punched me in the stomach, and I fell to the ground, doubled over in pain, clutching my stomach.

"Have fun on your 'date', slut," They growled at me, then left me all alone. I pulled myself back up, so I was standing.

Don't cry, don't cry. I can't cry, I'll ruin my makeup, and Niall will realize something's wrong. I looked in the mirror, to see the red mark formed on my cheek. Crap, what am I going to do? I don't have any concealer with me. I'll just have to make up some excuse.

I walked out of the bathroom, and back over to our table. Niall was staring at my face, "What happened to you?" He asked, shocked. My hand flew up to my cheek, wanting to cover it, even though he'd already seen it.

"U-Um, I just ran into the.. door," I lied.

"Tell me the truth, was it the fans?" Niall asked. Now, that's a better excuse. I nodded, "Y-Yeah..." I whispered, still lying.

"I'm so sorry, love," He whispered, "But, I need to ask you something."

"What?"

"Why don't you fight back?" Niall asked, "I know it's bad advice for someone, but why don't you?"

"W-Well, there is a reason," I replied, "Ever since my Father abused me, I had made the decision that I shouldn't hurt anyone. If I go and hit them back, what does it prove? That I'm just as bad as them? I'd rather let them hurt me, then hurt them myself. I don't ever want to turn out like them."

Niall was silent for a moment, "Yeah... I guess you're right..." He quietly replied.

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I'll update again tonight. I have to go to a friend's house now, and I really wanted to finish the chapter, so sorry about the bad ending. Well, comment, follow, and fave! Bye lovelies! -Madison