October30,2016 (one year after)
One year. One whole year. No happiness. No laughter. Just grey. And tears, lots of them. He left me.
Every one telling me to get over him because he was only a boy. But he wasn't, he was Shawn. The greatest thing that ever happened to me. The one I thought i would spend the rest of my life with.
I wish i could just live under a rock. I wish i didn't need to turn on the t.v or radio and be haunted by his voice or face. I wish i didn't have to turn on my phone and see him flaunting his new girlfriend around
I wish i could see his smile when i brought home muffins. Or his laugh when i make a stupid joke.
I wish one day he will wake up and realize I'm the one for him. Then he would come save me from the eternal hell he has put me through.
But most of all I wish i could be happy again. I wish i could smile without regret. Or walking into Tim Hortans without being reminded of him.
The funny thing is no matter how much pain and suffering he put me through in the
past year I still want him. I want him more than anything.
