Chapter 16

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AN//: TRIGGER WARNING! If cutting bothers you please don't continue reading!
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Chapter 16

Why her? Out of everyone in this whole entire world it had to be her? McKenna looked at me with her arms open. I raised an eyebrow at her, and began to shut the door. She put up her hand and stopped the door from closing.

"Okay, so no hug. At least let me explain myself," she said inviting herself inside, and closing the door behind her.

"How the hell did you find my house?"

"I have my ways, now listen. Thay night at the par-"

"No McKenna you listen. I honestly don't care what the hell you have to say about the night," my eyes began to fill with tears and I felt as if I was going to throw up. "No matter what you say right now, you can't change anything. What happened, happened. There is nothing you can do now to change that."

McKenna looked hurt. She stared at the floor and played with her hands. She stuffed her hands in to the pockets of her shorts and sniffed.

"I'm sorry."

I rolled my eyes and stared at her. Now she was going to makee feel guilty.

Why God? Why? Why did you have to bring her back?

"I think you should go."

I said opening the front door again. McKenna looked up at me and stared at me. Anger filled her eyes as she stared.

"You really don't care about me at all do you? All you care about is that stupid Kia whore, and you're stupid boyfriend who's cheating on you anyway! Fine, stay here. Stay with your "best friend" who hates you and your "boyfriend" who's cheating on you!" she glared at me before leaving slamming the door behind her, leaving me standing there alone in shock.

Was Kian really cheating on me? Did Kia hate me? Did Jc hate me? What if everything McKenna just said was right?

The tears that had recently filled my eyes were now falling down my cheeks. The thought of Kian cheating on me and Kia and Jc hating me just made me feel like complete shit. Why would they like me anyway? I'm just a stupid depressed girl who isn't needed.

I heard a door upstairs close and then footsteps coming down the steps. My guess was that it was Kian, and honestly I didn't really want to see him right now. I didn't want to see anyone.

Before whoever it was got to the bottom of the steps I opened the door and went outside. I didn't know where I was going, and honestly I didn't care. All I knew was that I had to get out of that house and be alone.

I walked down the street and walked past every building there was, past the park, the schools, the stores, and other houses. I kept walking until there were no more buildings around, just grass and animals. Looking around I realized I was on a hill that over looked a lake. There were rocks that were a perfect place to sit on and enjoy the view. The view of the lake, all the trees surrounding it, and the bright blue sky with a bunch of puffy white clouds.

I sat on the rock and looked around. The tears began to fill my eyes again. Being alone gave me a chance to think over everything that happened. What if she was right and my whole life right now was just a lie. It wasn't perfect at all, everyone hated me.

As the tears slipped down my cheeks I held my head in my hands, ignoring my phone that began to ring in my pocket.


After crying for what seemed like hours I laid down in the grass and looked up at the clouds. I watched as they slowly floated across the sky. They all had different shapes and they all looked like different animals, bunny, frog, fish, and a dragon.

It grew harder to keep my eyes open and eventually I fell asleep.

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When I woke up the sky was dark, the sun was gone now replaced by the moon, and the clouds were replaced by bright twinkling stars. I guess it was time to head home.

Slowly I got up and made my wag back to the house. I walked as slowly dreading the return to the house. I knew the minute I walked through the door I would probably be asked where I was, and everyone would pretend they cared when no one really did.

I sighed as I eventually came face to face with the door to the house. I slowly opened the door, but the house was dark. No one was in the living room. I walked inside, turning on the lights, and closing the door behind me.

"Guys? Kian? Kia? Jc?"

I called to all of them as I walked around the house, but no one was home. I felt the loneliness growing inside me that went unnoticed before. Maybe she was right, they didn't care. Nobody was even here, nobody asking where I was, no one asking if I was ok, no one was even worried. What's the point in being somewhere you're unwanted.

I started crying again as I made my way to the bathroom where I kept a hidden razor blade. I wasn't just unwanted here at the house, but in the world. No one cared about me, no one truly wants me here.

I found the blade and stood in front of the mirror above the sink. I set it down again my wrist, the metal feeling cold against my skin. I looked at myself in the mirror, my face was red, eyes puffy and red, and tear stained cheeks. I pressed the blade down a little harder, but not hard enought to cut myself. Taking a deep shakey breath I looked away from the mirrow and back down at my wrist.

There's no point in being somewhere where nobody wants you around.

That sentece kept playing in my head as I slowly began to press harder on my wrist.
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AN//: Thanks for reading everyone! I'm sorry for the delayed updates, I've been pretty busy lately. I'll try posting more for y'all!

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