Coward

Chapter Twenty Nine

My shoulders and back itch from the orange wool blanket that is wrapped around me. I shake into the warm glow provided by the fire. My eyes follow every flicker and every flame it casts as it dances over the smoldering wood. Beside the fireplace hangs my dress, stained with blood, mud and heavy with water.

Beside me, also sat on the wooden floor before the fire is Shane. The only dignity I am so deseratly clinging to is that although I had a mental breakdown infront of him I never cried.

Our shoulders are touching and I can feel the warmth he amitts seeping through my cold exterior.

I sigh, I can already feel a headach coming on. I so do not want to face what will be a killer hangover so much I accually considered drinking again, just to keep my buzz going. However the thought of one more drink has me gagging.

I dropped my head so it lay propped on Shane's shoulder. I didn't close my eyes though, instead we spent the night wide eyed and watching the fire. I didn't want to close my eyes and see his face like how I know I will next time I go to sleep.

Soon dawn light began to seep through the windows. The fire, now embers and ash stirs faintly as a gust of wind swirls down the chimney. I lift my head from Shane's shoulder and I shakily get to my feet however the overwhelming eurge to vomit has me on the ground within seconds as I try to gather my thoughts as the world spins, giving me a headache.

I cast a quick glance over to Shane who is slumped forward, asleep before crawling as fast as I can to the bathroom. I sigh in relief as I clutch the toilet tightly as if it's my only life line as I empty the contents of my stomach into it.

Soon, drawn by the attractive sounds of my vomiting Shane stumbles in. His eyes widen and mouth drops as he sees me.

I throw him a stern look as I grumble weakly, "what are you doing?"

He stays speechless as I heave another lot of alcohol induced puke into the toilet. When I slump against the bowel he finally exclaims a string of fowl language. "Wholly shit nuggets! You're pregnant!"

I press my fingers against my forehead and rub slow circles, "can you please speak a little quieter?"

His eyes widen, "oh right sorry, you're hungover." The he pauses and casts a fearful look towards my stomach, "fuck, what if that affects the baby."

If it wasn't for his concerned expression I would have laughed. I raise a hand to stop him, "relax I'm not pregnant, I'm probably just detoxing from whatever I took last night."

His shoulders slump forward slightly as he relaxes but a doubtful look still enters his eyes, "are you sure."

I nod and move closer towards the toilet, "yeah, I'm on birth control."

He nods and slowly sinks onto the tiled floor. He leans his back against the wall and observers me as I empty the contents of my stomach one more time. He runs his fingers through his hair which now flows freely just past his shoulders. I grimace and wrinkle my nose, causing him to chuckle deeply. "I don't think you're in any position to be judging my apparence," he frowns as his eyes move from my practically naked body up to my face. "You look like crap," he states plainly.

I weakly push my hair out of my face, "at least I don't have a man bun."

He rolls his eyes but smiles, "are you going to tell me what happened last night?"

I nod, I at least owe him an explanation for all of this. "Went to a party, got smashed, saw some fucked up shit, then came here," I sigh defeatedly.

Shane nods, his brown hair swaying with the movement. "The only thing is that you were wondering around the road, drugged up in the dark, what if some else picked you up?"