The 'Feelings' Journal

13. Sick?

Sam POV

As I stared at the ground I thought about that night. That moment played through my mind over and over again. Every touch. Every smell. Every thought. Except there were no thoughts in that moment. It just sort of... happened. One moment he was apologizing and thr next his lips were against mine. "I have to go." I said in a barely audible voice not even bothering to look up at him. "Ok."Jessie said his voice laced with defeat. I turned on my heel walking quickly down the hall. Once I made it to Thelma's door I pushed it open and tossed the journal on her desk. "Morning Samantha!" she said in a chipper voice. I just nodded and plopped down in on of the arm chairs. As she read my latest journal entry I stared at the ceiling and zoned out. Ugh I thought he would have at least gotten the hint that I didn't want to talk about the kiss. Not with him, myself, or anyone! Why did things have to be so complicated now? Unless I figured out a way to make it to where things weren't complicated at all. Just how? The calling of my name pulled me from my thoughts. It was Thelma. "Hmm." I hummed. "Are you okay?" she asked in a concerned voice. "PEACHY!" I said putting on the best fake smile I could muster up. "Samantha, I'm a counselor I can tell when someone is faking a smile." Thelma said as she got up from her seat to sit in a chair closer to me. "Tell me what's wrong.". "There is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I am just fine. Now can you please give me the journal so I can leave already?" I said in a monotone like voice. She looked at the ground disappointed. A pang of sadness hit me. I didn't have to be so mean to her, but I just.. I just don't want to talk about anything related to 'feelings' with anyone. "Sorry, I'm just... I'm not in a good mood today." I said quietly. "Alright. Well here's the journal and don't forget to write in it some tonight." Thelma said as she handed me the journal.

I took it and slowly made my way down the hallway. I wasn't really in the learning mood today, but I'm never in that mood. I was now at the end of the hallway looking at Mr. Dobb's door contemplating whether I was going to go in or not. A small smirk appeared upon my face as I thought. I wasn't going to let Jessie get to me. I'm gonna have some fun today to help get my mind off of him. I knocked on the classroom door. Mr. Dobb opened the door with a big smile. "Great! You're here. Just in time for studying for the test we have tomorrow." he said. I gave him a small fake smile. Phase on of my plan to have fun. Phase 1: The look of sadness. The key was to get him and everyone to believe that I was sick, but still wanted to attend school. I walked to my seat and sat down. "Hey, what's up with you?" Lilly asked. I turned to her making my face pain stricken. "I think I'm sick or getting sick." I said in a hushed voice. "Oh." she said kind of surprised. I wanted to laugh so bad cause she actually believed me, but I had to hold back my laughter for this plan to work. So I decided to communicate through an extremely old fashioned way. Notes.

S: I'm pretending to be sick so I can go home

L: OH!

S: Yeah. Can you help cause I really don't want to see Jessie today.

L: Sure what can I do.

I wrote down what I wanted her to do. She gave me a confused look. She mouthed 'Are you sure?'. I nodded. Phase 2: Double A aka Amazing Actress. The key was to be a good actress/actor to pull this part off and if you aren't you might as well give up now. Lilly gave a shrug and stuck her finger down her throat making it look like she was about to puke. I immediately gagged. My action caught everyone's attention in the room. "Uh Sam, you alright there?" Mr.Dobb asked. " I'm fine. I just think I nee-" I pretended to gag again. I quickly got out of my seat and ran for the bathroom. When I got to the bathroom I leaned against the wall trying to slow my breathing. Well I think that went well. I walked to the bathroom door and peeked out. No one came after me and no one was in the hallway. I slipped out the bathroom and took a sip from the water fountain. The boys bathroom door opened next to me and out walked Zack. "Hey princess." he said with a big smile. "Hey." I said with a nod of my head. I backed away from the water fountain and leaned against the wall. "So... u,... in the hallway this morning I heard you and Jessie arguing." he said leaning against the wall next to me. "Yeah." I said not really knowing what else to say. "You okay?" Zack asked putting an arm around my shoulder. "I don't know." I shook my head. "You know I'm here if you need to talk, right?" he peered down at my face. "Yeah I know. I just don't wanna talk about it at all." I admitted. Zack nodded. Just then Lilly came walking down the hall with my things. "Hey Dobb said that I have to take you to the nurse's office." she said as she walked up to me and Zack. "Nurse?" Zack asked while raising an eyebrow. "Don't worry about it. I'm fine." i said giving him a reassuring smile. "Alright you better be or I'm making a personal stop to your house missy." he said as he walked back to class. I laughed. "Alright." I called back.

Lilly and I walked to the nurse's office and knocked on the door. A plump woman walked up to the door and opened it. "Can I help you?" she asked in a that let me know that she didn't want to be here either. "My friend Sam here is sick and my teacher told me to bring her down here." Lilly explained as we walked in and sat down on the bench. "Oh really now?" the nurse asked raising an eyebrow. She came a little closer to me and looked at my face "She doesn't look sick to me.". "Well she is just look at her." Lilly said and as soon as the nurse looked back at me Lilly stuck her finger down her throat and I gagged. The nurse took a step back shocked. "Alright well I don't have anything here that can help you with something like that. So I guess I'm going to have to send you home." She said as she wrote a note. "Here take this to your teacher and tell him that I am sending her home." she handed Lilly the note and buzzed the office. I mentally cheered at my brilliance. Now let's just hope the rents don't find out and I'll be in the clear. "Did you drive here?" the nurse asked tearing me away from my mental party. I nodded. "Do you think you can drive home by yourself or do I need to call your parents?" she said as she picked up the phone. "No no I can handle it." I said in a weak voice. "Alrighty then. Drive safely and when you get home call hour friend to let her know you got home safe." she said as she helped me up off the bench. "Will do." I nodded as I walked out the door. I took my keys from my backpack and headed out the double doors and in to the parking lot.

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