Wasn't expecting that

Reality is hard

Serena goes to see what Raf is doing in work at this hour of the morning. "What you doing here?" Serena asks as she sees Raf on the floor with his head in his hands.

"Jack's died and Cara's ill" he says.

Serena doesn't know what to say to Raf as its come as a shock to her. "I'm so sorry to hear Raf, oh that's awful...what's up with Cara?" she asks.

"Some kind of womb infection... I know these kind of things... She may not be able to have children after" Raf mutters holding back the tears.

"Let's not think about the negative" Serena says.

"I've done something wrong in my life" Raf says.

"And what's that?" she asks.

"Something, life is just a fuck up" Raf says.

"That's not true, look Cara will be fine; give it a while and you can try again for another baby" she says.

"What if we can't" Raf says.

"They were both so fine this morning" Raf sighs.

"I know, she'll be fine; now why don't you go buy her some flowers or something?" Serena suggests.

"What's that going to do? That isn't going to bring Jack back" Raf says.

"Yes I know that, maybe ring her mum then?" she suggests.

"It's to early" Raf says as he lets a tear slip down his face.

"Aw Raf come here" Serena sighs as she hugs him. Raf says nothing as Serena hugs him, "why don't you go get some flowers for Cara and go wait for her on Keller?" Serena suggests as she gives him a tissue.

Raf nods and gets up and goes to see if he can find flowers. He heads down to the shop and looks at the flower and just picks up a bunch of roses as he's unsure what she likes.

He heads back up to the hospital and up to Keller, Cara is just out of theatre but hasn't woken yet.

Essie brings some water for the flowers and Raf sits next to Cara. "She should waken soon, everything went well" Essie smiles.

"Cara?" Raf says softly as she moves a little, Cara opens her eyes and adjusts to the light a little.
"Hey beautiful" he smiles, Cara looks at Raf all a little confused. "You'll be absolutely fine" he smiles.

"What happened? Where's Jack?" she mumbles.

Raf takes a deep breath in and tells her. "What?" Cara says shocked and Raf nods.
"No Raf no" she cries.

Cara start cry and Raf holds a comforting hand out to her. "I want to see him" she cries as she becomes really agitated.

"I want to see him!" She says again as she starts to thrash about and fight against Raf.

Essie hurries over to them, "Cara, Cara can you sit still for me; you'll hurt yourself" Essie says calmly.

"No I want to see my baby" she says as she rips her cannula out her hand.

"Cara, Jack died" Essie says as she calls for Sacha for a bit of help as Cara is really agitated.

"No he's fine" she says as she pushes Essie.

"No Cara he stopped breathing I'm afraid" Sacha says as he fixes her cannula.

"Cara he's dead sweetheart, I'm so sorry" Raf says as he fights back the tears.

"No!" She screams, "I don't believe you" she cries.

"Cara can you lie back for us and then we could maybe take you to see Jack so you do believe us?" Essie asks as she strokes her arm.

She carries on cry as Raf and Sacha keep her pinned down just incase she tries something else.

"It's alright Cara" Essie says in a soothing tone.

"Get off me you sly bastard" Cara shouts at Raf as she looks at him.

"Cara that's enough, he's here for you" Sacha says.

"I know your game!" She shouts at Raf.

Cara just cries and watches him which breaks Raf's heart, "I ache" she cries as she screams the place down.

She arches her back and tries to roll to get from Raf and Sacha's grip. "Shall we get you some more pain relief Cara?" Raf asks.

"Stay the fuck away from me" she cries.

"Cara, Raf's only here to help" Essie says.

Cara pulls her wrist free of Raf's grasp and tries to get her wrist free of Sacha's grasp.

She bolts upright and hurts herself so she lies back down again.

She holds her stomach and cries, "Let's get her on some more pain relief" Essie says.

"It's alright babe" he sighs as he takes her hand and strokes it.

She pulls her hand away and curls up into a ball and cries to herself. Raf can't help himself but cry too as he is in bits seeing Cara like this.

He wipes away the tears as Essie comes back with some pain relief. "Cara I'm just going to up your pain relief is that okay?" Essie asks.

"No!" She mutters.

"It'll make you feel 100 times better babe" he says as Cara is now letting him stroke her hand.

"I don't want it" Cara says.

"It'll make you feel lot's better, let's give you some" Raf says as he stands up and let's go of her hand.

"No don't leave" she cries as she grabs his hand again.

"Just leave it there Essie, I'll try and talk her round" Raf says.

Essie smiles, "I'll be back to check on her soon" she says and Raf nods and smiles. He sits back down on the chair beside Cara's bed and hands her a few tissues and wipes her face.