Nursery Rhymes for the Mentally Ill

Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater/Murderer

Peter Peter pumpkin eater, had a wife but couldn't keep her (cause she was a cheater). He put her in a pumpkin shell, and there he kept her very well! Basicly, he murdered her.

Frogs are the most disgusting and stinky creatures in the existence of the Earth. I bet frogs are in Hell, to make it more Hell-ish. And, we just so happened to be in Hell, AKA land of the freaking frogs. Ash, Dani, Ross and I were walking along a mud, moss, and, yes, frog covered road-- no, a random swamp, more like it, looking for...something. Anything. Clues to why we were here. Well, actually, I wasn't quite sure what we were looking for (ADD doesn't help). I was mulling over Jonathan, the ghosts I had seen and the strange whispering that kept coming in my ear. A voice, I guess. Maybe I should be worried, but I'm in freaking Rhyme Land, so I'm not bothered.

"Is this where the king lives?" I heard Dani say, drifting into conversation and following her finger towards a giant hill, WITH FROGS ON IT, and a big, towering, ugly door that made me want to puke. And then...the world just flipped. It changed, and people were everywhere, running, screaming. I collapsed on the ground, knowing where I was. I was back in dead land.

But not really. I was still alive, but I could see the ghosts. There were still lots of them, but one in particular was trying to get my attention, calling my name and waving. Dani's voice drifted away, replaced by a fearful yelling.

"Alice!! ALICE! Listen, child, look at me!" It was the woman who had been yellng at me before. She was probably over 50, with long white and grey hair pulled into a bun that was falling out.

"Um, yes?" I said.

"Stay away from here!!!  Leave NOW. That man that lives here, he is bad, Alice. He murdered me. His name is Peter, just stay away!!! Go, run as fast as you can because you will be killed." She faded away, but still was still watching me. I looked up, where Ross was standing over me.

"Are you OK?!?" He was freaking out. Ha.

"I just saw ghosts!!! They're still here!!! And we have to run RIGHT FREAKIN' NOW!!" I jumped up and grabbed his arm, along with Ash and Dani's, and ran like crazy. We needed to leave.

"What the heck, Alice?" Ash asked after we had ran at least two miles and were back in the town.

"OK," I said, trying to catch my breath.

"I just saw the ghosts. And this one told me to run away, because that house was home to her murderer, Peter the Freaking Pumpkin Eater."

"So...you believed a ghost?" Dani asked in a very annoyed voice.

"Uh, well, yes, but they seem nice and stuff...wait here, OK?" I hurried over to a place called

MOTHER HUBBARDS INN and got a room with three beds and a couch. It just seemed like the right thing to do.

It was night, and the three of them were fast asleep. I plunked myself down on the couch, trying to make the ghosts come again. It wasn't working.

"Alice." I whipped around, to find Ross sitting on the edge of the bed, close enough to touch me.

"Um...yeah?"

"I, uh, well--" He kissed me. Ross leaned in and put his lips to mine, and I have to say he was a great kisser. I tried pulling back, but he put his hand behind my head and yanked me in more. I could feel heat emitting from his body. I had a tingly sensation. My mind was telling me to yank away from his grasp, but I was telling myself to lean in closer. Right when Ash woke up.

"WHAT THE HELL?!?"