Gray Rainbow (Soramafu)

Stab

~Mafumafu's POV~

A few seconds past in silence, I was unable to move, because I was too scared and the fear I had paralyzed me. The next thing I could recognize was that my door was kicked open, I knew it was this sound because I often heard it in movies.

I closed my eyes and began to cry because I was too shocked to do anything else. I just hoped that were thieves who would steal my whole money and spare my life. It doesn't matter to me, money wasn't something that would make you happy anyway, it was just something to show off with.

Soon after I thought that, my door was slammed open and three men stood in front of me. I knew them, but I didn't know what they wanted from me. They weren't close friends of mine, they were literally just a bit closer than strangers, because I met them two or three times. But anyway, someone who breaks into someone else's house and scare them to death, shouldn't be called a friend.

I just sat there and cried, because I was deeply shocked and wished I would just die right now, in order to forget everything that happened, now and in the past. Even if I only disappear from the screen, everything that would make me feel better and get me away from this dumb and incredible shitty situation would be a great thing to me.

The three 'friends', maybe thought it was a joke or something, nothing else would even make the slightest sense to me. Why would they do something like that anyway? How can someone be that cruel? Did they even think of me as a human? Or did they think of me as a toy, which you can just treat like you want to and destroy it like that, too?

My thoughts were interrupted by them, who snatched the blanket away from me and smirked at me. I must have looked like a little puppy which was pushed into a corner. But my life wasn't even worth a can of trash, it wasn't anything worth at all.

They grabbed my arms and pulled me out of my bed, I tried to scream and defend myself, but I hadn't even a little chance against them, my voice kept quiet, too and my tears ran down my cheeks unconsciously. They brought me out of my house and laughed about me, they really made fun of me, I didn't know how someone can laugh about something cruel like this, I cried my eyes out and shivered, because of the cold. It was autumn right now and the nights were very cold and windy.

I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself, but it changed nothing, I still cried and I still wanted to die badly. Everything just now seemed so cruel and unfair to me. Why I am always the one who was bullied? Why did I have to be the one who was not like everyone else? Why did everyone treat me like garbage?! What did I do wrong in my life?! Was it my whole existence?

All those questions, which I could never answer with anything positive always threw me even more in my depression and broke my self confidence over and over again. Everything that I liked about myself was destroyed because of other human and myself. No person on earth could change my broken and tired self. Nothing could bring me back my happiness again.

This situation made me think of things that others and even myself always told me. "It gets better", they said, but now I think they lied. Nothing gets better, all that happens to me is bad, nothing ever changed?! I'm just garbage to all of the people, I'm someone who is always the last and worst in everything. The one who was made fun of in school, the one who will never get a real life and jobs like other people.

And who's fault is that? Right, myself, it's always like that, even I began to think that they were right, it can't be a coincidence, I'm always the dumb one, something must be really wrong with me. Maybe they we're right, when they told the teacher that everything they did to me was my own fault.

Suddenly they let go of me, I opened my eyes and looked up. I saw a person standing in front of me. The men who pulled me out of my house, just stood there and were obviously very shocked and surprised, about who was standing in front of them. I couldn't see him clearly, because it was too dark, but as he began to speak, I realized whose voice it was, it was Soraru-san's.

I cried even more, maybe this time because I was happy someone came and saved me, even though I couldn't be sure, he seemed to know them, too. Maybe he wanted to let me suffer, like the other ones. These thoughts burned themselves in my brain and I looked at him with my swollen eyes and with my croaking voice I asked him,"why are you here?"

Soraru-san looked down at me, me, who was kneeling on the ground, crying and looking like he was about to die, and suddenly he smiled. He just stood there for a few seconds and smiled. Even if I wanted an answer, that he smiled like this, made me feel, like it was good to be alive, like it was good that I didn't take my life yet. Everything seemed so much brighter, he only smiled and for me it was like the sun raised right now.

He opened his mouth and said with his husky and deep voice, "Everything is alright now, don't cry anymore, I'm not here to bully you. I'm here to help you, alright?" The man who stood beside me looked at him very confused and angry, and whispered, "I didn't even know that you were friends with him, Soraru. To be honest, I thought he hasn't any friends at all." I looked at the ground in front of me and clenched my fist. He was right, I didn't have any friends who understand me completely, maybe the only one who was something like a friend was Amatsuki-kun.