Gray Rainbow (Soramafu)

Liar Witch And Gray Rainbow

~Mafumafu's POV~

The next day, I packed my bag and made my way to the train station, so that I could visit my parents.

I hadn't seen them in a really long time and I had the feeling, that I couldn't even recognize them anymore. One reason was surely the time between our last meeting and today. The other one was, that I haven't been close to them since the beginning. Because of that fact, I never told them about the bullying. I didn't want them to remember me as someone, who was sad and had problems all the time. So I always forced myself to be happy in their presence and I begged the teachers not to tell my parents, about anything concerning my problems.

But at this time, it was harder than all the times before. The accident yesterday and the thing with Soraru bothered me and I even thought about just trying to find an excuse for not coming, but nothing I thought of really made sense and I wasn't good at lying either. So I decided to go and try to hide my real feelings for the rest of the day.

I sat in the train, that I took to get to the town where my parents now lived. It was a small town in the north of Japan and the ride took about 3 hours. They felt even longer, because of the anxious feeling that came to me, when thinking about them talking about topics I tried to avoid. Topics like love, children and so on. Maybe I should try to get the conversation to my job. It was the only good thing right now. Music was always something, that made my day get better and my life worth it.

As I looked out of the window, I took out my phone and plugged in my headphones. I started the music and then observed the trees and houses, that I saw on the other side of the glass. They passed by like shooting stars and somehow I had the feeling that they were just like my relationship to Soraru yesterday. One moment we were really close and one moment later, when he saw the girl, I had the feeling everything was over.

I sighed and hit my head against the cold surface. I told myself, that I should stop thinking about him. I told myself that since yesterday and I still couldn't really keep myself from thinking. It was hard and somehow depressing, that this person could make me get so irritated and distracted.

For the rest of the ride I kept myself from thinking about him.

The sun shone really brightly as I stepped out of the train. Even though it was like this, it was still very cold. I took my scarf and put it on. After that I looked around and tried to remember the way, they described on the phone. I should have asked them to pick me up, I thought while sighing.

I called them and not even ten minutes later, after they came and we drove to their house, I sat in the well-known living room. Even though the TV and the other devices were new, I felt like nothing really changed in there. The couch was the same, the pictures of my family on the wall too, even the weird figures of my dad were still there.

"How have you been Mafu-kun?", my mom asked. "I've been fine. My career is going well, I've had many ideas for songs lately and my birthday was nice too.", I answered and then watched my mom getting all excited, while my dad explained, before going into the kitchen to get the present, "We bought something for you." My mom nodded and hugged me, while congratulating me again and again.

"You've become really handsome. I'm glad you're doing well. I was worried about you, because you never called or something like that!", she told me to fill the time my dad was away. "I was busy during the past years... I should have called you.. . I will try to contact you more often in the future. I'm sorry.", I tried to excuse myself, even though she didn't sound, like she actually blamed me. "It's okay, as long as you're happy.", she stated smiling and then looked at my dad who came back at this moment.

All of this felt somehow strange. In the past, we've never been this close. They never were with me on my birthday and I only got presents, when I asked them if I could have something for my birthday. Of course I didn't really celebrate, too, and because of that, I sometimes got the present about one month later. I don't really blame them for it though. They both worked hard and tried their best to give me a good life. Even though for me, happiness never was about money. For me happiness were days, on which I stayed home and no one spoke to me.

I actually knew, that I could have changed the fact that I was bullied, if I had talked to them about it, but I never could get myself to it. I just didn't want to bother them more than I already did with my existence. For me, they worked so hard and I was grateful to them for everything they gave me.

As I finished these thoughts I looked at the present in front of me and said, "Thank you. I'm glad that you remembered my birthday, but I don't deserve a present.", I said and my mom immediately answered, "You do! You're such a good child and you never got into any trouble.", "Just open it.", my father added. I looked at the gift and thought that opening it, was a waste of the amazing looking wrapping paper. Either way, it would have been impolite to not take it, so I opened it and looked at the expensive looking necklaces in front of me.

"Why are there two of them?", I asked while my mom took one and put it on for me. It was a plain looking silver necklace with a round pendant, which you could open up and put a picture in. "For the special girl in your life.", My mom said proudly and hugged me tightly. I gulped and laughed nervously, "Ah, thank you. Hopefully I will find a girl soon", I lied.

I didn't want to destroy their expectations of me having a family and such, so I just pretended, to never have been in love with someone and decided to not even mention Soraru. Maybe it was really better, that he didn't like me. At least I didn't have to explain my relationship with him, to my parents.

"Don't lose it OK?", my father said while handing me a box, in which he put the other necklace. "And when you put in a nice picture, please show it to us, OK?", he then continued. I nodded and thought what to do with it.

Should I give it to Soraru on his birthday? Wouldn't that be weird? Maybe when Christmas came, but this was actually something for couples too. I sighed silently. I would give the necklace to him at Christmas. He would never get what this was actually for, so it was okay. At this times it was good, that he was so naive.

"Do you have an idea who you want to give it?", mom asked and I shook my head. I did actually know, but I couldn't tell them of course. The only thing left, that I didn't know, was, which picture I should put in... Maybe I should just wait for a good opportunity. I thought about Soraru, but if anyone ever would find out... It would be hard to explain this.

And again, I thought about him. I could slap myself for this. I tried to forget about it and concentrated on the conversation with my parents again.

Fortunately the topics, that followed were some, that I didn't try to avoid. We talked about how my other relatives were doing, about my older brother and so on.

After the dinner, I had to take the train to get back. It was only a few hours with my parents, but I felt closer to them, than during my whole childhood. It was a good and at the same moment depressing feeling. I wish I would have been close to them while I was still living with them, but I can't change the past, so I have to try my best right now.