Gray Rainbow (Soramafu)

Super Kitty World

~Mafumafu's POV~

I really was glad when I got to bed this day, without having any bad or frustrating thoughts and the next day started relatively good, too.

I got a message from Soraru, in which he invited me to go to a cat cafe. I was very happy, that he wanted to meet me, he probably wanted to spend the time with me, that he couldn't be with me last week.

Either way... The only bad thing about this, was the cat cafe. I was allergic to them since I was a small kid and I had the feeling that it got worse and worse over time. The only problem I now had was, that he already was there and saying, that I wouldn't come would have been rude. So I decided to go the coffee shop and meet Soraru.

I literally sprinted to the cafe, because I didn't want him to wait longer, than he already had, but I was so unlucky this day. Every traffic light tried to stop me with their red colour and I only could stay there, wait and let out a frustrated sigh.

At the last red traffic light a small woman caught my attention and I didn't even know why. She didn't stand out much, but I couldn't look away from her. I almost missed the opportunity to walk across the street. At this moment I didn't know, who she was, or what place she was going to take in my life. Maybe I could have changed it, if I had known it?

Panting and looking around nervously, I stepped in the door of the coffee shop and searched for the black haired male, that I wanted to meet here. When I saw him sitting at a table, stroking over a cat's head, I somehow felt like I would going to disappoint him, when I had to tell him, that I couldn't stay here, because of the allergy I had.

So I decided to try enduring it for as long as I can. Geez... I was such an idiot. This plan couldn't work out, but I didn't want to accept it at this moment. I wanted to see Soraru happy and being with cats was obviously one thing, that made him happy.

I cleared my throat and sat down next to Soraru, who already smiled at me. "Hello, Mafumafu. I didn't think you would come anymore." He greeted me and I explained, "Ah, yes. I woke up late and couldn't see your message any earlier, but I'm glad you're still here.", "Of course. Even though I wanted to meet you, being here and play with the cats, is actually reason enough to come here from time to time.", He answered.

"I think so too. I love cats, but I don't have much time to come here.", I lied. If I really wanted to go here, I would have found the time, but this wasn't the reason. The reason was something I know felt coming back. I already couldn't breath through my nose and I felt that my eyes began to swollen, too. I tried to hide my face, so that Soraru wouldn't notice, but of course I had to start coughing this moment and I could feel Soraru's worried gaze looking at me.

"Mafumafu? Is everything okay? You look like you've seen a ghost. You're whole face is pale!", he said sounding, like I could die any moment, but maybe I would. Hopefully not... I didn't want him to see this. I actually didn't want him to see me in this state either, but it was already too late.

I tried to speak, but I couldn't at all, every try ended in more coughing and I had no other choice than running out of the coffee shop and try to normalize my breath.

Soraru followed me confused and you could tell, that this situation really messed him up. "Mafumafu what's going on? Are you by any chance allergic to cats?", I nodded and caught my breath. "Why didn't you tell me beforehand?! I would have met with you in another place! Didn't I tell you to be honest?", he shouted at me and I had the feeling every person on the street looked at us.

I looked back at him and I wanted to disappear so badly. I was so bad at handling situations like this. I always blamed myself for this kind of things to the point, that I thought my life was nothing more than a burden.

I bet he saw my expression and felt guilty for shouting at me. This was the only explanation for me, for what he did now. He hugged me and stroke over the back of my head. "I'm sorry Soraru-san.", I mumbled, before I felt warm tears running down my cheeks. "You... You looked so happy in there... I just didn't want to disappoint you. But now I disappointed you even more. I'm sorry for not being able to do anything right. I'm only-", he didn't let me finish the sentence.

As he abruptly ended the hug, I felt a sharp pain in my cheek. "Don't talk like that! You don't know how you make me feel by doing this! All the time I'm the one who makes you get in pain! I start to feel like I'm actually your problem... I don't want that... I don't want to be your problem Mafumafu... I want to help you. I'm sorry I shouldn't have slapped you...", I didn't know what to say at all. His voice sounded so broken at this moment. All I could do, was staring at him.

Did it really sound like this? I only blamed myself and he said, he was the problem? I couldn't understand this. "I already said, that everything is my fault! I could've told you about the allergy...", I tried to explain myself. "But, without me, you wouldn't have had to come here in the first place. You wouldn't have felt like you're disappointing me and-", "I probably would have been alone for the whole day." I interrupted him.

"But you have Amatsuki-kun... ", Soraru said. "He's really busy with work. Oh... I remembered something." I gave him a USB stick and succeeded in changing the topic, by doing this.

"What do I need it for?", "Some ideas for your last song. I only could come up with some lyrics.", I explained. "Ah, but you have to be with me, while I try to compose the melody.", "Of course, but let's talk about it somewhere else, OK? The wind is really cold." He nodded and we went to a small manga cafe, not far away from our position.

Even though I changed the topic, I had the feeling, that we would come back to the allergy thing again and I was really scared about it. It was a part of myself and of my past, that I didn't like talking about at all.