Gray Rainbow (Soramafu)

Melancholy Of Verdigris

~Soraru's POV~

As I looked at my phone, which showed me the message Urata send to me, to invite me to meet him, Sakata and Mafu at a cafè, I remembered the look Mafu gave me, as he opened the door yesterday. His eyes were swollen and I could easily tell, that he had cried a few moments ago. Actually, I wanted to ask him about it, but somehow I didn't really wanted to know what was going on, even though these 'bad things', he talked about, when he told me the reason he liked Neru's songs, made me get curious. I only wanted to make him forget these things and smile again. 'Make him smile again?' I sounded like I was his girlfriend, but I was only a friend. A friend he did know for only two days. And still... I wanted to see this cute little boy smile. He really was like a little brother for me. I replied to Urata's message and then put the phone back into my pocket.

Walking down the street, to the cafè he invited me to, I hoped Mafumafu would feel better today. He was really kind to me and I couldn't think of any reason, that would let him deserve this sadness, that made him cry. Somehow, I thought, these thoughts were pretty strange. The thought that I only knew him for two days and already wanted to stay by his side forever and protect him crossed my mind again. Why was it like this? I always have been a person, who helped other people, when they had hard times, but I knew them for a much longer time than him. He really was something special for me. With this, for me still a bit weird thoughts, I arrived at the building, where Urata, Sakata and Mafu already waited for me.

After I greeted all of them, I looked at Mafu and smiled. “I'm glad you're here.” I said and could see that he blushed a bit, before he answered, “I only came because Urata-san was so annoying.” I looked at Urata, who explained, “I did this, because we hadn't met for so long and I'm really bored these days. Furthermore, it's much more fun with you and Sakata-san.”, “And why did you want me to come?” I asked. “Mafu-kun said that, if you wouldn't have come, he didn't want to come either.” My eyes wandered to Mafumafu who looked to the side, probably to avoid my gaze. Why was he so focused on me? I didn't understand him at all... I had thought the same, as I heard he wanted to have pictures of me from Amatsuki. I originally went to him, to ask him about it too, but as I saw that he had cried, I put that thought immediately away. I didn't want to ask him right now either, because the reason could have been embarrassing for him to tell.

So I only looked at him and joked, “You really do like me, hm?” His reaction made me really uncomfortable, because he only looked at me with a surprised and at the same time, sad face. He looked hurt somehow and he let me regret my action right away with this expression. I think Sakata realized this too, and changed the subject, “Your album, Soraru. Do you think it will be finished soon?” I sighed and replied discouraged, “I don't really know. I just can't think of anything for the last song.” Urata looked at me and said, “Why don't you ask Mafu-kun? He writes really nice lyrics.” Mafumafu didn't listen at all and when I looked at him, he just let out a small “Eh?”. “We talked about you, Mafu-kun.” Sakata explained to him. “Ah, really? Sorry, I thought about something else...” He said somehow nervously. I got a bit worried, because I had the feeling, he tried to avoid explaining, what he was thinking about. “We wanted to know, if you could help Soraru with his album.”, “Of course I want to help him, but I don't know if I can come up with something in the next time.” He looked a bit bothered. “It's okay, as long as it's within one month, I think.” I answered and could see that he lit up a bit. “I will do my best.” He smiled at me and I felt like his happiness did make me happy too.

We changed the topic again, but Mafumafu talked less and less and at one point I had the feeling something worried him. He just stared at the cake he got earlier and didn't even touched it. So I ended the conversation, wished Sakata and Urata a good day and dragged Mafumafu to a karaoke bar. At first, he didn't want to, but after about 3 minutes of arguing, he gave up and just followed me.

“I didn't thought you could be this annoying Soraru-san.” The copper haired guy said. “I'm actually not like this, but you're a special case. You always keep your feelings inside and you don't search for help at all... You think it's better because you don't want to be a burden for anyone, but I think it's really selfish of you. Everyone wants to help you, but you keep pushing them away...” I blamed him. He lowered his gaze and mumbled, “You don't know anything about me and still you judge me?” I got angry as he said this, even though he was actually right. “That may be the case, but then tell me, why are you not talking with anyone when something is worrying you.” He looked at me seriously, before he said in a dark voice. “I'm not bothered by anything...”, “You're a liar! You would never cry without a reason and spacing out all the time, while talking to your friends isn't normal either.”, “I didn't-”, “You did cry. I saw your swollen eyes yesterday.” He looked at the ground and started to sob. “You're right Soraru-san. I'm sorry.” I saw tears falling down. I felt a bit sorry, but it was the right thing to say, “It's okay, as long as you promise me, that you will be completely honest to me about your feelings.”

He agreed after he calmed down a bit and I wanted to know badly, what he thought before he did so, because it really took a long time, but I didn't want him to feel even more uncomfortable.