Gray Rainbow (Soramafu)

State Progamm: The Second Puppet

~Mafumafu's POV~

This day couldn't get any worse. From the first morning light that shone into my room and woke me up, I knew that this would be a really lousy day. Only one minute had to pass till I felt like getting up was just a waste of my lifetime, but I had to go to the cafè, even though I thought like this. If I hadn't come, everyone would have been bothered and maybe Amatsuki would have gotten upset after Urata told him, I didn't show up. But obviously going to meet them and then thinking only about getting back into my bed and don't listen to what they talk about, didn't really go well together either. Well, if I think about it now... I would prefer an upset Amatsuki over an upset Soraru, but thinking about it, wouldn't change anything. So I had to endure this unbelievably terrible and unpleasant situation, no matter what I did.

"It's okay, as long as you promise me, that you will be completely honest to me about your feelings.”

The words he spoke repeated themselves again and again in my head. Many thoughts crossed my mind, but only one was really important. One, that I thought should never be spoken out loud.

"I will. I will be honest. From now one. Please, forgive me for being a selfish person..." I begged him and looked directly into his beautiful dark brown eyes. They looked just like expensive jewels to me. As he looked into my eyes, I had the feeling he could see right through me and then he said, with his deep unique voice, while sitting next to me, "OK, I will forgive you and now let us have some fun, alright?" I nodded, not really enthusiastic about his statement, and looked at the two black microphones in front of us.

"I think drinking something to loosen the mood would be good. Don't you think so, too?" I agreed immediately, maybe, If I would drink enough, I could forget this day. This was actually my plan, but after rethinking it, I came to the conclusion, that I didn't want to forget what followed. Just imagining Soraru singing right in front of my eyes gave me goosebumps. I always wanted to see him live, but unfortunately I never had enough money or time to do so.

So I decided to only drink a bit of alcohol.
"Should I get two beers?", His question interrupted my thoughts. "Uhm... Well, I don't really drink beer, it's too bitter.", "Then I will get something sweet." I couldn't really understand the names of the drinks, he then ordered next to some snacks, but they sounded pretty fancy. When the drink stood right in front of, me I could totally confirm, that the name matched the cocktail. It was a mixture of blue and green. I wanted to know the name, but I was too ashamed of asking, because I thought, that at my age, I should at least have a basic knowledge about alcoholic drinks. I always felt like I was more than just 3 years younger, when I was with him.

After he drank a sip, he looked at me with a small smirk on his lips and then asked, "How long do you want to keep staring at it?" , "I just like the colors.", I answered pouting. He just kept smiling at me adorably. I couldn't be mad at this guy for a long time. He was just too cute, even though he looked more like the bad, sleepy type of guy. His hand, which hold the microphone directly in front of my face, let me stop my fanboy-like thoughts. "What do you want to sing?" I took the micro, after nipping on my drink and replied, "Let's sing glow by Keeno." He nodded and then started the song.

This song wasn't, what I actually liked to sing, but I thought that it would match Soraru's voice really well. Not even some seconds later I could tell, that I was totally right about it. It sounded amazing. His low, breathy voice, I never could properly imitate suited that song perfectly. His style of singing was so amazing too, you could really hear that he had a lot of experience. This unspeakable nice combination made me forget, that I had to sing too, so when my part started Soraru looked at me totally confused.

"Eh... Mafu? Don't you want to start singing?", I heard his wonderful voice say. I startled and looked at him. I could feel how my cheeks got warm due to the embarrassment. "I'm sorry, I was so absorbed in your singing, I totally forgot to start." His reaction was really cute. He blushed a bit and then scratched the back of his head. "Ah, really? I don't think my singing is so absorbing.", "It totally is! It's amazing how you can put this much emotions into the song!", "I'm not that good, you're exaggerating!", He said really seriously. I sighed and then grabbed the micro to continue, what we started earlier.

"Your voice isn't bad either.", He said after we finished singing the song. "I don't think, I could ever catch up with you.", "I am sure you're already at my level.", He replied while nipping on his drink. "I can't agree. Everyone could tell, that you're my senpai.", I stated. "I don't think so, your high voice is amazing and unique.", "Your's is just the same.", I tried to convince him. He gave up and just started the next song.

When the snacks were eaten, my eyes wandered to Soraru, who already drank his third glass. As much as I wanted to know, how he behaved when being drunk, as much I was scared he got really hateful. Fortunately, he became really clinging. He even laid his head on my shoulder and wrapped his arms around mine. The only comment he gave me for this was, "You're really comfortable and soft, Mafu-kun." He even said Mafu-kun... I felt like my heart melted. Of course I didn't even think about taking advantage of the situation... Ok, I actually thought about it, but I would never do this. For me simply sitting next to him like this, was already a great thing. I could feel the warmth of his body. Even though this day was still lousy, I had the feeling Soraru's presence comforted me a bit. I still felt like just running home and lay into the bed, but feeling him breath, made me get calm and somehow happy.

Of course, my mind couldn't let me be happy for a second.

I felt how I teared up, as the thought, that being so close to him, wasn't a state that would be forever, crossed my mind. Sooner or later he will get a girlfriend. He will marry her. He will get kids with her. He will be happy with her. She will give him everything I can't give him, because I'm not a girl. He will forget me, right? He will. He would never admit it, but he will. Tears run down my cheeks for the second time on this cursed day.

I startled as I felt warm fingers on my cheek. "Why are you crying, Mafu-kun?", "I... I thought about the future." I truthfully explained. "You're really starting to be honest... Thank you..." He gave me a short, sweet smile and then continued to speak, "I want to have a bright future with you."

"A bright future with me?" As he said this, my heart skipped a beat, but it calmed down right after he explained his idea further.