Down in the Forest || Joshler [Completed]

22- Promise

A/N
Meeting new frens through TØP is literally so great !!
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"We should go back," Josh said, quietly. His voice was as soft as the flower petals that surrounded us. I hummed sadly in response, keeping my head against his shoulder. I knew that he was right. "It's really late."

"I know," I sighed. "I just want this moment to last forever."

"Me too." He placed a kiss on the top of my head and I shut my eyes. I let myself memorize the feeling of his fingers laced within mine. He pulled away and I sat up. My lips curled into a frown as I stood. He did the same and wrapped his arms around my waist, hugging me from behind. I turned myself to face him, placing my forehead against his.

"What's going to happen when we go back to school?" I felt him tense up at my question. He didn't want to talk about it. Neither did I, but we had to.

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean," I said, moving away enough to see his face. He shifted his focus to my chest, refusing to look up at me.

"I know what I want to happen." He paused for a moment before continuing. "I want to be with you. I want to walk down the halls holding your hand. I want to tell my friends that you're mine. I want to be yours." I felt my heart swell as he spoke. I tightened my grip around him, not wanting to let go.

"I want that too, Josh." I saw him smile, but he kept his gaze low. "But-"

"But, what?" Josh cut me off, finally looking up at me. His smile was gone.

"I-" I tried to start. My voice broke and I shut my mouth, swallowing the lump in my throat. I tried not to cry. "I'm scared. Hell, I'm terrified."

"Why?" Josh's expression softened. I felt a few tears fall and he moved his hands to cup my face, wiping them away.

"You know w-what happened t-to Ryan. They'll do the same to me." My attempts to hold back my tears failed and I let them fall. Josh just wiped them away as if they were no problem and let me continue. "I'm so afraid, Josh. I don't w-want that. I've worked s-so hard to be the guy I am at school. W-worked so hard to convince everyone I'm someone I'm not. Convince them I'm better than I really am. I don't want to lose everything."

"You won't lose everything, Tyler," Josh reassured me, placing his lips to my temple. The kiss seemed to soothe the headache that had started to form.

"I do want to be with you," I said, sniffling. Josh smiled at me and ran a hand through my hair.

"Then promise me you won't ignore me at school. Promise me you'll be honest," he said, calmly. My mouth contorted into a frown.

"Josh-"

"Please." I couldn't believe he was saying this. He didn't trust me. I kissed him delicately before moving my lips to his ear and whispering

"I promise."

He wrapped his arms around my waist and hugged me tight. I clung onto his back and let the rest of my tears fall. He kissed my cheek before pulling away and gathering my things for me. I took my ukulele and notebook from him and watched as he folded the blanket. He slung an arm around my shoulders before beginning the walk back to camp.

When we reached our cabin, Josh held the door open for me and I walked to pack away my ukulele. Josh closed the door quietly before removing his hoodie and putting it back into his bag. I picked up a pencil and sat on my bed.

"What're you doing?" Josh asked.

"I just need to write something down. If I don't do it now, I'll forget it."

"Okay. Don't stay up too late." He leant down and kissed me before climbing up onto his bunk. I opened to a fresh page and placed the pencil to it.

You are surrounding all my surroundings,
Sounding down the mountain range of my left-side brain,
You are surrounding all my surroundings,
Twisting the kaleidoscope behind both of my eyes.
And I'll be holding on to you

I smiled down at the book before closing it and slipping it into my bag. I pulled my shirt off and stuffed it in after. I closed my eyes and thought about the feeling of Josh's lips on mine, touching them softly with my finger tips.

Not the same. I thought as I drifted off to sleep.