The Drunken Feathers

Scene X

(The following day, late afternoon. MRS. FITZHERBERT sews quietly in her living room when the PRINCE OF WALES suddenly enters. MRS. FITZHERBERT stands in surprise, concerned about why he might be here. Feeling nervous but excited, he removes his hat and bows.)

MRS. FITZHERBERT

(Surprised)

Your Royal Highness, what are you...

PRINCE OF WALES

Mrs. Fitzherbert. Forgive the intrusion, but...

(Beat, determined, moving closer to her)

Je'taime de tout mon coeur.

MRS. FITZHERBERT

Pray, sir, do not say anything which might bring shame to us both.

PRINCE OF WALES

How could I be ashamed to tell you how much I love and adore you, and to thank you for the immense joy you have introduced to my life?

MRS. FITZHERBERT

(Embarrassed)

Your Royal Highness...

PRINCE OF WALES

You captivated me that day at the opera, and since then, you have filled every crevice of my mind. I knew from our first meeting that I could never again love anybody but you, and that every lady I'd professed to love before you paled in comparison to your beauty and nature. I feel at peace knowing I, in the bloom of my youth, have found what some men spend their whole lives searching for fruitlessly: a female companion whose soul mirrors their own. I feel as much anxiety at not knowing whether my love is reciprocated, but you can alleviate that.

MRS. FITZHERBERT

(Moving back a few inches)

I am flattered, sir, but hardly deserving of Your Royal Highness' praise and love.

PRINCE OF WALES

No one in this world is more deserving than you, my dear, dear Maria. You possess virtues so admirable that I have scarcely encountered them: piety, moderation, loyalty. You remind me so much of the queen, only you are kinder, more understanding, more patient. You may have heard many unfavorable reports of my behavior since you arrived, but I beg you not to judge me by these alone. Since our first meeting, I have aimed to better my character so I might be worthy of being yours, and I can only hope to God it is sufficient to win your heart.

MRS. FITZHERBERT

I know not what to say. No words are adequate to convey my sentiments while protecting Your Royal Highness' delicate feelings.

PRINCE OF WALES

Then say nothing, my angel. Consenting to be my mistress shall be all the confirmation my heart requires.

MRS. FITZHERBERT

(Beat, incredulous)

I beg your pardon, sir?

PRINCE OF WALES

You can live with me at Carlton House. No luxury shall be spared for your apartments, I assure you. My carriage awaits outside to take us there, and after my ball for Mr. Fox, we can finally...

MRS. FITZHERBERT

(Insulted)

I, your mistress? I may not be a virgin, but I am no whore, sir!