The Drunken Feathers

Scene xxiii

(The throne room in Windsor Castle, several days later. Bach's "Air on the G String" begins to play. An irritated KING GEORGE III is shown sitting on his throne while glaring at the PRINCE OF WALES, his head leaning on his hand, and his elbow resting on the arm of his throne.)

PRINCE OF WALES

I imagine I am not Your Majesty's favorite son at the moment, given the circumstances of my visit.

KING GEORGE III

(Quietly, testily)

Do you?

(The PRINCE OF WALES is shown standing in front of KING GEORGE III, facing him directly.)

PRINCE OF WALES

Undoubtedly.

KING GEORGE III

Is Your Royal Highness aware that your debts have nearly doubled since Colonel Hotham first began to calculate them?

PRINCE OF WALES

(Languidly)

I am, sir.

KING GEORGE III

Is Your Royal Highness further aware that since my loss of the American colonies three years ago, this country has suffered severe pecuniary deprivation, and that, were Parliament to liquidate your massive deficit, its financial tribulations would only be exacerbated?

PRINCE OF WALES

I am, sir.

KING GEORGE III

Yet Your Royal Highness has the audacity to approach me with a request for monetary support, so that you may return to Carlton House and waste your money more frivolously than before!

(Beat)

You never cease to disgust and disappoint me.

PRINCE OF WALES

In what way, Your Majesty?

KING GEORGE III

(More agitated)

In every conceivable way! Since the day you were released from my care, you have proven yourself to be devoid of all morals and...

PRINCE OF WALES

Now, that isn't fair.

KING GEORGE III

Not fair?

(He stands, shouting)

Not fair?!

(KING GEORGE III rushes toward the PRINCE OF WALES, whose eyes widen as he nervously steps back.)

KING GEORGE III (cont.)

Let me tell you what isn't fair: having an heir who has impetuously succumbed to decadence!

(The PRINCE OF WALES looks frightened and confused. KING GEORGE III's expression softens and begins slowly walking back to his seat.)

KING GEORGE III (cont.)

(Quietly)

My own father—Frederick, Prince of Wales—and you are alike in many ways. He spent the majority of his short life engaging in gambling, copious drinking, and whore-mongering, habits that robbed me of a father and now rob me of a son... To see you mimic his behavior is enough to kill me. 'Tis a wonder I am still alive... But my father never lived to be King. Do you know what killed him, at the age of forty-three, of all things? A cricket ball to the lung.

(Louder)

A cricket ball! I was but twelve years of age... What the Prince loved most in the world was not his family, or his country, or even his God, but sport and pleasure. He could have lived virtuously, ascended the throne as King Frederick I, and reigned with pride as his father did and as I do... But he decided to waste his life away instead. He, like you, hated his parents and defied them...

PRINCE OF WALES

I do not hate...

KING GEORGE III

You will let me speak!

(Beat. Quieter, after a sigh)

As you hate me, so did he hate his father, George II, and so did George II hate his father, George I! I had hoped you and I would break that vicious cycle, but it seems I should abandon that hopeless prospect... This reminds me of a famous parable in the book of Luke. It is called 'The Prodigal Son.' I hope you have read it.

PRINCE OF WALES

I...know of it.

KING GEORGE III

(Resuming his seat on his throne)

The parable describes a righteous man's wicked son who demands his share of the inheritance. After squandering his fortune upon prostitutes, liquor, robes, and gambling, he was obliged to return to his father in rags. He expected to be forsaken and made a slave. However, upon his return, his father embraced him warmly and celebrated his return by slaughtering the fatted calf for him!

(Beat)

The sole distinction between The Prodigal Son and your predicament is that you shall not receive such God-like mercy from me...until I receive a sufficient explanation of your past expenses, and see a prospect of reasonable security against a continuance of your extravagance. It will be necessary to have as clear an explanation as the nature of the thing will admit, of your past expenditure, and above all to ascertain that it will be confined within proper limits in future.

PRINCE OF WALES

(Loftily, frowning)

Your Majesty shall receive no further disturbance from me, as I am now convinced that I have no reason to expect either at present, or in future, the smallest assistance from Your Majesty.

KING GEORGE III

If Your Royal Highness chooses to interpret what has passed in this way, that is your own affair, and the consequences of doing so will be imputed only to your own determination.

PRINCE OF WALES

And what consequences are these, Your Majesty?

KING GEORGE III

Your Royal Highness shall discover that for yourself if you refuse to accept my assistance.

PRINCE OF WALES

So be it. I shall dissolve my deficit without Your Majesty's help.

KING GEORGE III

What is this? You will receive my aid, but only once you have assured me that you will confine your spending habits in future!

PRINCE OF WALES

I decline this halfhearted offer; as a man, I should have every right to determine my own budget.

KING GEORGE III

Fine, then! Go on and submit to your own indebtedness. You stand on thin ice, sir, and I will not rescue you when it gives way and drowns you!

(Beat)

Your very presence makes me ill. Leave me.

(The PRINCE OF WALES, unsatisfied and frustrated, quickly bows to KING GEORGE III before turning around and exiting the room. As he passes through the doorway, he slams the door shut behind him and continues walking down the hallway. Mozart's 'Overture to The Abduction from the Seraglio' begins to play. Cut to ACT I, SCENE XXIV.)