The Way We Live *Cimorelli Story*

Expecting Too Much

dani 

I just couldn't sleep tonight, the pain was in my heart. Stabbing me. Stabbing me repeativly. I can't take it anymore. People knowing my every move like I'm a science experiment. I'm tired of people treated like I'm crazy. I'm not. They just don't understand my mind. 

Why would they understand though. Even my family don't understand me. I expected too much. They don't know how it feels to see that comments that read, "What's wrong with Dani's voice?" or "Why is Dani dressing so weirdly?" It's not fun to see that. Then you see comments like "I LOVE LISA! <3" Then you wonder, am I different? Am I bad? 

I layed back down in my cell that's not going to harm me. I might not be physically, but mentally, I'm bruised and broken down. Not bent, but broken. 

I sighed and closed my eyes. It was dark everywhere. I just thought of ways that I could die. Tears seeped through my eyelids and tears rolled down my cheeks. 

That night I slept thinking if the world would finally be happy if I died. 

********************

I woke up to a ringing. A ringing meant someone was here to see you. I assumed it was from next door, but it was mine. 

"Dani Cimorelli, your family is here to see you." the annoucer said. 

Some security guards grabbed my arms roughly and dragged me to this room. This was exactly like prison. 

"What?" I snapped since all of them were staring at me. 

It was only Mom, Christina, Lauren, and Christian. 

"Can you tell us what happened honey?" Mom reached out to touch my hand, but I refused and took my hand away. 

"What happened? What happened is life. Life decided to go south instead of north."

"Be more specific." 

"God shitted on me." I say using colorful words. 

"God did not. You did." Christina defended. 

"Sure because I wanted to be adopted, I made mom and dad become kidnapped. Yeah, of course because I'm always the one to be blamed!" I yell standing up. 

"Take me back." I tell the security guard. He led me back to hell, but its better cause I'm alone. 

I plugged my earbuds into my ears and went into hibernation. Where I block out the world. The world that I used to know. 

*************

When after dinner, a therapist came up to me and said I was released from rehab. 

"Why?" I mean I don't think I got any better. 

"Your family released you." 

"They are not my family." 

"Then who are they." 

"Enemies." 

"They have the same last name as you." 

"Whatever." I went to my room to gather my few belongings into a bag and went out. 

The lady at the front desk said she wanted to talk to me. 

"I wish you well Dani. I see a bright future for you. Remember to be the odd one out." She reminded me. 

I nodded and smiled. I walked away and mumbled, "That's the problem though." 

I got into the car and was greeted by mom and dad. 

I turned my cheek and looked out the window. 

I had nothing to say nor nothing to look at. Just mind your own business and you'll live Dani. 

I had a little pep talk with myself. 

We arrived home and I walked in without consult. 

"DANI!" Lauren came and hugged me. I kind of replied the hug, but then she dragged me upstairs.

"Dani? What happened?" 

"YOU! You were gone for 4 weeks! I was alone and no one cared!" I was beyond mad. 

"I'm Sorry!" 

"I'M SORRY DOESN'T CUT IT! I HAD SUFFERED and no one understood me." I went into the bathroom and locked it. I sat into the corner and stayed quiet. 

(agoraphobia kicks in) 

I stayed there for the next 30 minutes. 

**************

I went out of the bathroom later and I got my chance to shower. I looked in the mirror and I was still a mess. Wow. 

I took out my diary and wrote. 

Dani's Diary 

Dear Diary, 

            Today is the first day back from rehab and let me tell ya, it was exactly like the time before. I'm lonely and sad. Once again nothing has progressed. So I kinda have nothing to do, but sometimes thats the best thing have. Just enjoy the silence because whatever will be, will be. 

Mom and Dad are back though. I was surprised by that. Although when you're in rehab for 2 weeks, your kinda like blocked from the pressures of the world, but there they do nothing to help you! They trap you in a cell and then they leave you thinking you'll jut heal by yourself. If it happened that way then we'd just be in our rooms forever and we don't have to pay for rehab! Crazy nutballs. 

Thw worst thing about life, is the only way to escape is to die. 

                                                         Yours Truly,

                                                                    Dani 

A/N: So Dani's still sad. D': I don't really know what to say, but I have to go back to school tomorrow! *sad face* Anywayyyyyyyyys, vote/comment/and be awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :P Out.