"So tell me that you love me
And tell me that I take your breath away
Maybe if you take one more then I would know for sure
There's nothing left to say
Tell me that you love me anyway"
- Victoria Justice, 'Tell Me That You Love Me (feat. Leon Thomas III)'
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Oh. My. God.
Oh. My. God.
Were they having sex?
They being Keller and John, of course. I was just sitting in my room, trying to resort back to my old good-student days by studying for my test, when I heard it. It being the thumping sound. And... noise making. Which lead me to believe that Keller and John were having sex. Because it wasn't like they were re-decorating her room.
I mean, I understand and I love Keller and John and everything, but still. Did they not know that I was still there? I know that I hadn't left my room in a while, but come on.
I put my headphones on before I could have an emotional breakdown because there is nothing more unappealing then knowing that there are two people just going at it on the other side of the wall. It was almost grosser than walking in on Hollister and Other Dog at the park that one time. Oh my God, this was so gross.
Maybe if I waited it out they would stop. But then they would know that I was there if I walked out of my room and that would make for a very interesting conversation. Sex talks were always awkward, no matter who they were with.
Holy shit, they were loud. What the hell was going on in there?
But what if they didn't stop? What if they decided that they were just going to keep it up all night and that I would be trapped in my room forever? What would I do then?
Wait a minute, Hunter. You were a college student and John and Keller had been dating for as long as you had known them. You would just do what you normally did when you speculated that there would be sexual intercourse taking place in your apartment: you left.
And it was finals season so it meant that there would be people in the library. People that were not having sex, too. So I could just sneak off down there without Keller and John noticing and then let them keep having their moment. And then, when it got late and I got tired, I would just call the apartment a bunch of times to make sure that the coast was clear and then I could go back home and I would live happily ever after.
It was one of my better ideas, so I ran with it. I quickly threw my laptop and random books into my backpack and sprinted out of the room, avoiding any possibility of having to see two of my best friends having sex with each other. The first time that I had walked in on them I didn't sleep for a week. I'm not even kidding, either. And then I washed everything in the house. Keller didn't complain about that, though, because she hated cleaning.
The walk to the library was always kind of dreadful because it literally was on the opposite side of the campus. It was kind of like a small hike just getting there. It was comparable to climbing to the summit of Mt. Everest when the weather was bad. Which was, like, all the time, except for that night. But whatever. It was better than having to sit at home and listen to my roommate have sex with her boyfriend.
