" My loneliness is killing me
I must confess I still believe
When I'm not with you I lose my mind
Give me a sign
Hit me baby one more time"
-Britney Spears, 'Baby One More Time'
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I caved. I told Keller the first chance that I got. Actually, I don't really consider it to be ‘caving.' Caving implies that Keller had been pestering about what had transpired between Louis and me when she really hadn't asked at all. Actually, no, she didn't ask at all. Which wasn't that much of a surprise because she had been doing a marathon studying session and hadn't really said much of anything.
Basically, I had just sat next to her, staring, until she finally asked me what the hell my problem was (like there was only one) so that I would leave her alone. And then I told her everything in grave detail. And then I said it all again in case I left something out. And then the third time was so that it was clear that she understood what was going on. She did.
For one who always has an opinion on everything, Keller really didn't have much to say. Which really sucked. Like, I'm not even kidding, she didn't look happy or angry. Instead she just gave me a really weird look before asking me if she could borrow one of my old sweatshirts. And then she asked me what I planned on doing now because apparently I was already supposed to have a plan.
"Uhhhh," I stammered, looking at her blankly. Think- wait, remember how that always turned out? Think at a reasonably paced manner, Hunter. "I don't really know what I'm going to do now. I think that I'm just going to play it by ear." Yeah. That seemed like a smart idea.
My roommate didn't find it as brilliant as I did. "You do know that Eleanor and Louis are getting married in less than two weeks, right? This really isn't the time for you to start ‘playing things by ear.'" I also have to give her credit for not using air-quotes. As embarrassing and childish as it was, I was all about using air quotes. They really helped me emphasize my points.
"I... I thought that you weren't helping me out," I said, tossing a hoodie in her direction. Seriously, though, did that mean that she was going to give me advice now?
Keller easily caught the hoodie with one hand and started tugging it over her head. "Yeah, I thought that I was going to stay out of this as well," she grumbled, "but I can't just let you crash and burn."
Hallelujah! Didn't this mean that Jesus was now on my side? Not that Keller was the holiest person around (I don't think that she'd ever been to a religious ceremony while on campus. But then again, neither had I), but she was the one that was caught between the two of us and if she was on my side then that would have to mean something important. And- wait, what? Why did I have to crash and burn?
"Why do you think that my plan won't be successful?" I asked sadly. I mean, I know that I hadn't put that much thought into it but I still thought that it was a good idea.
"Because you thought of it twenty seconds ago?" Of course she would know how good (read: terrible) I was at making up things off of the top of my head. "And the last time that I told you to smooth things over the two of you ended up sucking face!" she grumbled, yanking the hoodie down over her face.
"Hey! We weren't ‘sucking face.'" I did it. I busted out the air quotes. It was almost instinctual at that point. "He barely even kissed me. It lasted, like, what, one, maybe two seconds? And he didn't even try to slip the tongue on me. He didn't even touch me! One of his hands was behind his back, that's how casual the kiss was!" I was getting a lot better at defending myself. "It was super friendly and didn't mean a thing." Okay, now I was lying and had said the word ‘super.' It was all going downhill.
