"There's a weapon
which we must use
in our defense:
silence"
- The Go-Go's, 'Our Lips are Sealed'
--------------------------
Capitalism.
Squash, Hunter, you really should've considered reading that book all the way through. Because now I knew absolutely nothing on that stupid final.
Okay, maybe that was a slight exaggeration. I did know most of the things listed on there. But still, for the only person on campus that even bothered studying, everyone else seemed to be just flying through it. Sure, there was the overwhelming possibility that they were all just guessing and actually knew nothing, but there was also the chance that I was simply just the dumbest student at Oxford. Super.
Not to mention that more than half of the class was already finished. What the hell? There was no way that they had actually retained everything in that book.
Plus I had to be at Eleanor's bachelorette party as soon as this thing ended (classes at Oxford have super weird scheduling. Night classes are actually a lot more common than you'd imagine). I'd never been to a bachelorette party before and really had no idea what to expect. Especially because it involved strippers.
I had only been to a strip club once because Junior had messed up the address for my great uncle's funeral and we ended up at one of those. It really was one of the most disturbing things that I had ever lived through and was completely unhygienic. And I had been there with my brother, which is so wrong that it's not even funny. Not even like it possessed the possibility of ever being funny; it was that bad.
Anyways. Capitalism. Or, more specifically, the aspects of capitalism that we had never discussed in class before. Really, this day was getting better and better. It was my last day of my sophomore year of college and I was still taking a final that was full of things that I had never learned before. You can do this, Hunter. This final was probably the least of your concerns. I still hadn't taken the time to talk to Louis because I had been studying and packing and avoiding him and apparently not studying hard enough.
Okay, I was over-thinking it. I was over-thinking everything. I just needed to let loose. Isn't that was people did at bachelorette parties? I scribbled in the rest of the answers to the test and stood up, walking over to my professor's desk to hand my test in. There were only four people left in the classroom.
"Thank you, Hunter. Have a great summer back in America, okay?" My professor smiled at me. Yeah, I would've been happier if you would have covered at least half of those questions in class.
But I didn't say that. "Thanks, Professor! I'll see you in the fall!" was what really came out. Then I made a mad dash out of the classroom because I was going to be late to help Keller start setting things up for Eleanor's party, which was being held at Keller's off-campus apartment. Yes, the strippers were going to be gyrating all over my future home.
I was tripping over my own feet when my phone went off. The ID said that it was Keller. Great, she was probably going to yell at me for something.
"Hey, I'm on my way there now," I said, pulling my gown up so that I could walk. Oxford had this ancient tradition of the students having to wear the old ceremonial cloaks when we took our finals. They basically looked like the gowns from Harry Potter except a lot lamer because it was impossible to do anything in them. We didn't have to wear them that often; it was only for things like finals or if you had to go visit the dean. But it really was a hassle. They were super uncomfortable and smelled like old people.
