Why Don't You Figure My Heart Out? (Matthew Healy)

// We've Got One Thing in Common, It's This Tongue of Mine //

I woke up with a pounding headache and a warm body next to mine, probably Ryan. I got up and went into the kitchen to fetch some painkillers and water. I put them in my mouth and took a small sip of the water, then picked up my pack of smokes off the kitchen counter and went onto the balcony. It was freezing and only then did I realise I was in my underwear. I ran inside quickly and grabbed my robe and chucked it on, heading back outside. I lit a cigarette and took a drag, looking around at the view from my shitty apartment. My apartment wasn’t fancy. It was quite gross, to be honest. The disgusting floral wallpaper was peeling off in almost every room. The couch in my living room had cracks in the dark green leather, yellow foam sticking out. The mirror in the bathroom is filthy and the shower never gave out hot water, let alone worked half the time. The tiles in the kitchen were a sickly pink colour and nothing in my home matched, but it was the only thing I can afford that’s close to work and the supermarket in walking distance. I have my licence but I can’t afford a car so I either walk or take the train everywhere I go. Anyway, I put out my cigarette in the ashtray and went back inside, closing the sliding door behind me. I decided that I’d go back to bed for a little while, just to rest my head. I can’t recall anything that happened after the show and going backstage last night. The whole thing was a blur. I took off my robe and hung it up in the bathroom before walking into my room and getting back underneath the blankets. I turned on my right said and saw that the person lying next to me wasn’t Ryan.

It was Matty.

I instantly sat up in bed, my head spinning out of control, making me growl at the pain. I looked over at Matty and saw his eyes begin to flicker open. I freaked out and ducked under the covers, pretending to be asleep. I felt him sit up, fast.

“Oh fuck” he said under his breath. He gently shook me to ‘wake me up’. I stirred slightly to convince him I was sleeping.

“Ryan, not now” I mumbled with a slight smirk on my face.

“Uhh, it’s um- it’s not Ryan” he said, nervously. I sat up in bed and looked at him. His hair was a mess. He pushed it back and away from his face, just like he did last night before they started playing. He was shirtless and only in his boxer briefs as opposed to his skinny jeans and loose black shirt that he was wearing last night. I pulled the blanket up to my chest, hiding my semi-exposed breasts.

“Matty, what the fuck happened last night?” I asked him sternly.

“I-I don’t really remember too much. I know that we played a show, I met you and Ryan and invited you backstage. Then we drank a few- a lot – of beer and did some shots. Then we got stoned” he mumbled, still trying to remember all that happened last night.

“Um, did we-“ I asked, pointing my finger back and forth to me and him. “Did we have sex?”

“Uh, yeah. I think so. I mean, I don’t remember too much, but I remember that we had an amazing night together. Ugh, this seems so awkward. Do you want me to leave? I can totally leave if you want me to” he said, nearly standing up while pointing to the door. I pulled him back down and kissed him softly. After he pulled away, he grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and wrote down his phone number. “I really want to see you again. I think you’re really sweet and cool and beautiful. Just give me a call when you can, yeah? The rest of the band and I will be in Manchester for 3 more weeks before heading off on another tour. I really like you, Maddy” he said with a hopefull half smile. He then got up and put on his jeans and that same loose black shirt from last night that make him look even more sexy. He grabbed his leather jacket and opened the door. I put my robe back on and walked him to the door. I gave him one last kiss before he left.

“I’ll see you ‘round, Maddy”