Losing It

18

I woke early this morning, I had to drive into Spalding to pick up my grand mother Akishma and then bring here to my house, better yet Jason's house in Ocho Rios. Yes, we moved into a freshly bought town house with four rooms, two baths, a kitchen and a living space. I finally pulled up a her house is Richmond and honked hard.

I'm  little tired after two hours of driving from mom's to here and I'll have to do it in reverse. My cousin Billy came out with grandma's bags. Billy was a tall, handsome boy just graduated from St. Elizabeth Technical and works at a phone shop in Christiana until he can pay to go to university.

"Good morning Kerroline." He said as I flew the trunk. He came back around and poked my nose. "Tell granny to hurry I have to go collect my dress." I snapped at him.
"Say good morning."
"Suck your ma billy."
"That's mean, let her rest in peace bitch."  he said angrily.
I covered my mouth as I remembered she died a year back in a car accident. He walked away and murmured some expletives. Granny came out and jumped in. "Sorry I had pudding on the fire. Oh my child how are you?"
"Fine grand ma." I said driving towards Mandeville, where I would buy food and then drive to Spalding again to get home.

When we finally entered Ocho Rios I was falling asleep. Thank heaven I pulled up in the parking lot just before my hands went stiff on me. Jason came out.
"Hello, let me get those for you."
Granny was laughing and talking his ear off. I got out of the car and went in. "Micah?" I called. He must be watching television now. I went to his room. "Mommy. Look look." He said hugging my leg. "Wow that's a pretty dog. Did you have breakfast?"
"Just wake mommy."
"Are you hungry?"
"Super! Duper!"
"Okay I'll go cook. Grandma is here go look for her." I turned off the TV and walked out behind him. His little body ran down the hall and into granny's hands. "Jason come here."
"Yes boo?"
"Can you pick my dress up at Debby's please. I haven't slept and I can't drive."
"But I have to go to work."
"Work? Its Saturday, I thought you didn't work on weekends."
"I have to go fill in. Ask Ryan."
"You ask him,  he's your friend after all. Micah!" I handed the little kid his breakfast and went to sit in the chair. I felt the waves of sleep over take me and what happened after that was consumed by sleep.
***
I woke the next day early as always since the past five months. I looked at the calendar smiling, my wedding is tomorrow! I still can't believe how fast life moves, maybe this was the constant change mom always mentioned in our pep talks.

I had too much to do on the last day of being single, memories of my past relationships came back and I smiled knowing I am winning both ways. I had to have some fun tonight, I picked up the phone and called none other than .. " the number you're trying to reach is out of service.." I hung up and sobbed in my hand, Gia was still gone I seemed to forget that in the heat and excitement of things. I crawled in bed not wanting to go out without my best friend.

  After two minutes I got so bored I literally blazed into the shower and out the door. I wasn't going to call anyone,I can have fun all by myself. I went shopping in three different towns then I hit up a Victoria secret outlet for a few after wedding apparels *wink*  *wink*, had my picture taken and I was on my way home when I decided to stop at a bar for a drink.....I deserve this.

I sat at the counter and Lenny handed me a beer, I used my teeth and opened it as always. "Lenny the place is really hitting high levels." I finally said after about three shots of Brandy. He laughed hysterically and nodded. "Yeah, I'm selling it to my cousin. I'm moving to America."
"No Lenny no." I said sadly I felt my head spin and I think that's my queue to head home. I walked out staggering,the blurry outline of my car was straight ahead. I barely made it without throwing up. I had to fight to exit the lot without busting up someone's tail light and I had to hurry before I fall asleep. I sped down the free way  at about 100 miles per hour.

Suddenly, to my misfortune, blue and red lights started trailing me. 'I was just one corner away from my house' I screamed in my head. I wasn't going to stop so I pressed gas harder. Almost there.... Wait is that a "fuck!" I slammed on the breaks and the car skidded on the gravel. The little boy ran back in the yard after picking up the ball. And you can guess who came along right after. The sirens echoed to a halt right behind me.
"Officer please..." i began begging as my window went down.
"Kerr, I didn't expect you to be on a high speed chase."
It was Jeff, I laughed hard
"Are you drunk? Breathe." He leaned in and I exhaled. "DUI, speeding almost crayoning the road with a child's blood. You know I have to run you in."
"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!"
"Swearing in the presence of an officer."
"Oh come on! I really have to go home! The baby is coming soon, from day care." i said as if that'll would help.
"I'm sure Jason will have that under control. Step out of the car."
I hissed at him and came out, gave him the key. "Fuck! I'm so dead!" I said sitting in the backseat. "This is a lesson, okay. Don't drink and drive."
"Fuck you. Jeff really?"
"Yes, that could have been Micah."
"Just fuck me up already,"
"What?"
"He's gonna be pissed, that's his car."
"I'll make sure he gets it back in three days."
"No! We are getting married tomorrow, then going to Montego Bay."

He stopped the car and looked at me, "am I invited?"
"You got one in the mail."
"Let me take you home then. Don't let this happen again."
"Thank you Jeff."
I beamed as he turned the car around.