Cute Things: A Namjin story <3

Part 11: I Want You Too

~Seokjin POV~

This view is absolutely gorgeous. I can't believe he took me here.

Suddenly arms wrap around my waist and Namjoon whispers in my ear. "It's ready now. You can turn around." I laugh because I was startled at his touch but turn around anyway. I feel my mouth fall open as I try to take in what's before me. There's a big, soft blue patterned blanket laid out. More blankets are set off to the side. Different size and colored candles are placed all around. There's a few throw pillows thrown around and in the middle is a bunch of different foods and drinks. There's also a small fire pit burning. I thought I smelt a fire. A fucking glorious picnic in a beautiful, flowery clearing viewing the city as the sun sets. This is a date. Namjoon planned a date for me?

"NAMJOON-AH!" I exclaim, smiling but surprised. "Do you like it?" He asks, smiling and slightly pink. I don't even know how to respond. No one has ever put this much thought into something for me. I ended up just launching myself into his arms and plant kisses all over his face, making him giggle. I pull back, smiling so hard it hurts. "I love it!" I squeal and he chuckles. I excitedly tow him over to the picnic and we sit across from each other. "There was not this much stuff when we walked up here!" I exclaim. It only seemed like he carried a few bags. He smiles sheepishly. "I actually came here so often that I brought a bin or two that I hide to store blankets, pillows, and the fire pit. As well as some alcohol." He laughs, holding up a wine bottle. "I probably don't even need to hide them considering I've never seen one person around here." He finishes.

We start to dig into the food. "So, how long have you been coming here?" I ask, curious. He smiles at me. "Since I was a child. My mom actually brought me here." He says and I look up at him surprised. He then continues. "My mom and I would sleep here under the sky when we didn't want to stay with my dad. She told me that this place meant a lot to her. If you'd like, I'll tell you the story. It's a sad happy ending though." He says, searching my face. I nod curiously. He takes a deep breath and then pours us each a glass of wine. He looks up at me and smiles.

"My mother and my father were arranged to be married since they were children. They never thought of each other like that though. They always just seemed like friends or even siblings. So they both tried their hardest to change their parents' minds. They were engaged since the beginning high school but they both agreed to let each other secretly date other people. Are you keeping up?" He asks, and I nod for him to continue. "They were told that as soon as they graduate, they would marry. So they both dated others until then. My mother found her first love when she was just fifteen. She was absolutely in love with him. He came from a relatively poor family and was a seventeen year old artist who liked to travel. Since he knew that their love was a secret, he would bring her here for dates." He says, gesturing the clearing around us.

"They would sneak around and see each other whenever they could. They didn't want to break up because they truly were in love with each other. They even found a house they absolutely adored. My mother tried everything to get her parents to give up on the arranged marriage. She would talk to my dad about it and about him. My dad told her that if they are still forced to be married that he'd still allow her to see him. However, months before my mother was to be married to my father, her lover told her they could no longer see each other." I gasp and he pauses. He reaches out and strokes my hand.

"My mother was completely heart broken and didn't understand. He was crying when telling her and said 'it's for the best'. She tried calling him and even visited his parents home. She found out that he had broken up with her because..." He pauses. "Why did he?" I ask, and Namjoon gives a sad smile. "He was terminally ill." He responds. I feel my chest tighten and I frown. "He thought that because he wouldn't live much longer and because she was getting married it would hurt her less to give her up. Although when she found out and found where he was, she was incredibly hurt and mad." He says, sadly. I feel sad too. I rub circles in his hand. He smiles then continues.

"He wanted to spend his last few weeks here in this clearing before he was to be hospitalized. My mom found him here and practically collapsed in his arms. They stayed here and did nothing but make love and cry. My mom stayed by his side when he was hospitalized too. She even held his hand when he died. He meant everything to her. She told me so many stories about him." He says, smiling but hurt in his eyes. He looks at me and wipes the tears I didn't even know where there. When the hell did I start crying?

"My dad isn't really my father." He whisper, looking like he might cry. I wrap myself around him, not wanting him to be upset. "What do you mean?" I ask, confused. "My parents never touched each other like that. My mother found out she was pregnant two months after he died." He mumbles into my skin, his tears hitting my shoulder. Once I realize what he means I hold him tighter and rub circles into his back. We sit like that for a while. We both pull back to look at each other and giggle at our red eyes. " After she found out, She told my dad. He told her not to worry and that he'd help her. He felt bad seeing her go through something so traumatic all by herself and thought that she would need help. So they moved up the wedding and got married early. He took care of her and several months later I was born. My dad knew neither of us were his but he still loved us. He tried his best but sometimes his hurt would get the best of him and he'd push us away. He knew my mother wasn't happy with him so then he brought up divorce and she agreed." He says, tears brimming storms in his eyes.

I wipe them for him and peck his lips. He smiles then continues. "I didn't know until my mother was on her deathbed. She finally told me everything. I remember being a child and hearing all of the wonderful stories about him. I always wanted to meet him so bad. My mom and him made me believe in true love. Once I found everything, I felt like I was shot. Both of my parents died of terminal illness. I felt so alone. My father took me in at first to make sure I was okay and processing everything. I told him that I had to live in that house though so after a few months I moved back in. My house was the house they both wanted to live together in." He says, his brown eyes burning into mine.

He then he's like he wants to say something but is hesitant. He looks down and takes a deep breath. "I wanted to live there with my first love eventually. Yoongi just moved in to help me pay rent. I thought once he left ... Jungkook would move in." He says, his voice above a whisper. Is he saying Jungkook was his first love? He sighs and continues. "I honestly thought he was my first love. I honestly thought we were in love. I thought wrong though. I never noticed how he never felt the same and how he didn't want me. I'm so glad, it wasn't him to move in with me." He looks up at me, his face serious. I'm so glad he wasn't really my first love." He says, his voice a whisper.

My heart starts beating hard in my chest and I feel butterflies everywhere. Oh shit. Is he saying what I think he's saying? What does he mean? There's no way. You didn't even know. You were clueless. You had no idea this entire time. You pretended you didn't know why you're scared. How didn't you realize?

You've fallen hard Seokjin. You want him and love him too.