Cute Things: A Namjin story <3

Part 18: I Was Fooling Myself. I've Never Been Happy.

~Seokjin POV~ I know it should be Namjoon POV but nope. LOL

Sunlight. Bed. Arms. Warmth. Alarm.

Wait, these aren't Namjoon's arms.

I spring up, realizing it's Yoongi who's hold I'm in and hastily shut off the alarm. I try to shake his embrace around me but his grip gets tighter. "Fiveee more mintuez Jiminnie." He mumbles under his breath. I chuckle and poke him. "I'm not Jiminnie and I have school, Yoongi." I tease, pinching his cheek. His eyes spring open and he slaps my hands away. He stares at me for a few seconds with tired narrowed eyes. "Never do that again." He growls. I laugh and gesture to our position. "Are you going to let go?" I ask, wiggling a bit. "I'm too tired to get up." He groans, pouting. He's kind of adorable in the morning.

"What if I make breakfast?" I suggest and his eyes light up. I laugh as he let's go of me and he mumbles a few 'shut ups'. I get up and head towards the kitchen. I search through his barely filled fridge and cabinets to find food. There's just enough eggs and bacon for both of us. "Jeez Yoongi, are you as bad a cook as Namjoon?" I yell, laughing my head off. He lazily strolls into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes. "Don't compare us. He could burn fucking cereal." He says, grumpy. That makes me laugh more as I go to flip eggs. He starts making coffee with a slight smile plastered on his usually cold face. Once out breakfast is done, we sit at the table in a comfortable silence. Something registers in my head and I look up to see Yoongi staring absent minded at his coffee.

"Hey Yoongi.." I start, unsure how to ask. He looks up, his expression blank. I open my mouth but find it hard to word it. "Uh ... Why are you being... so nice to me?" I question, and frown at the way I phrased it. I look down, nervous to look at him in the face. "I mean I didn't think you really liked me at all, especially since what happened between us. I don't understand why you are helping me, if you never cared for me at all." I look up and become terrified. He looks pissed or maybe annoyed. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything.

"Sorry I j-just-" I start but he cuts me off with a raised hand. "Jin Hyung, please stop." He says, his voice hard. I must have looked pitiful because his face softens. He sighs deeply as if he's held it in for years. "There's a lot that happened between us that you misinterpreted. There's a lot about me you don't understand. You might not believe it but I never meant to hurt you. I was afraid. So don't say that I never liked you or cared for you because that pisses me off. Please don't bring it up again. It was in the past and I don't like thinking about it." He says, almost looking vulnerable. I just stare at him, unable to process what he just said. Everything was a lie? The whole relationship that ruined my self-esteem and innocence wasn't what I thought it was? Who is he kidding? Does he know what I went through?

I calm the anger rushing through me. I look at the table, clenching my jaw. "You might not have meant it but you still hurt me. I don't like thinking about it either but it's hard to forget something that practically ruins your whole view on life and love. I'll let it go for now though because I can't take another person upset with me. I'm going to go get dressed and text Namjoon to meet us out by the gates, okay?" I say, finally looking up at him. Everything on his face is cold but his eyes are rather regretful. He just nods and I stand up, putting my dishes in the sink.

I go get dressed and freshen up. Once I'm done, Yoongi goes to get dressed too. I quickly unplug my phone from the charger Yoongi let me borrow. I open up a blank text, not certain of how to text him. Just do it coward. I text him the words 'I'll be by the front gates before school if you want to talk.' and hit send. Yoongi comes out of his room and grabs his keys. "Did you text him?" He asks and I nod. Right then, my phone buzzes and I see I got a reply. 'Okay.' Really? Just okay? God, maybe he is really upset... I sigh and follow Yoongi out to his car. We pull out and zoom off. There's a intense silence between us but the soft song playing on the radio soothes the atmosphere a bit.