Lams One-Shots

I Hope That You Burn

"Peggy?" John asked, concerned. "What's wrong?"

The smaller girl was shaking like a leaf as she burst into John and Alex's dorm, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. 

"I...I walked into Eliza's room to see...to see..." She buried her head in her hands. How do you just break someone's heart like that? How do you tell your best friend that the love of his life is betraying him? It killed her, but John had every right to know. 

John put a comforting hand on Peggy's shoulder, guiding her to the couch. She was trembling as she whispered, "She was having sex with Alexander..."

John's heart stopped beating in that moment. His eyes grew, his hand dropped from Peggy's shoulder.

Alexander was cheating on him with Eliza. 

He felt his fingers ball into fists, his teeth clench and his eyes stinging with tears. Alex was supposed to be his boyfriend; loyal to only John. They were supposed to love each other forever and only each other. 

"You can cry," Peggy whispered, now being the comforting one instead of the comforted. "It's alright."

John felt himself sink his head into Peggy's lap. Sobs erupted from his body as she stroked his hair softly. "Shhh..."

Alexander Hamilton cheated on him with their best friend. John was heartbroken, to say the least. He could feel his heart being fragmented, slowly being pulled apart. 

After Peggy has left, John sat on their bed. He had his lighter from when he used to smoke and the letters Alex left in his locker in High School. 

It went from when they were best friends, simple notes like "hey, pizza @ 3" or "study session? ur place 5."

To when they had mutual crushes, such as "you know, ur eyes r rlly pretty" or "looked good today. starbucks later."

And after they started dating, when Alex had very poetically written "i love u john laurens, you complete me. thanks for being my everything."

Those hurt the most to reread. If John was his everything, how come he went to Eliza? I wasn't enough, he supposed, I don't satisfy him. 

He heard the door click and his head snapped up. Alex was walking in, smiling. "Hey John, I'm back!"

John was silent, staring at Alex. A mix of hurt and hate were in his glare. Alex sensed something was wrong, and he began to worry.

"John? Are you okay? What happened." He caught sight of the letters and the lighter. "John, what's those sheets of paper? Why's there a lighter? What the hell is going on?"

John stood up, holding the notes in his hands. "You think you can play with my heart Alex? You really had me going there. A year and a half, that's how long you had me going."

"Wha--John, you're scaring me." 

"You really made me believe that you loved me. Kisses, late night hugs and cuddles. You were believable."

"John," Alex pleaded. "No, I do love you. Don't say that."

"Then how was Eliza?" John spat, contemptuously. He could see Alex pale. Any lingering trust he had in Alexander faded. The last string broke in John's shattering heart. To see Alex look so guilty. 

"I...I didn't see her today, I don't know."

"Liar," John said, stepping a few paces towards Alexander. Alex thought he looked angry, until he saw the tears, sliding down John's freckled cheeks. "You fucking liar!"

"John, please!" Alex said, stepping a few paces backwards. He felt tears come to his own eyes. "I'm sorry, it was a mistake!"

"How long?"

"2 and a half months..."

"So it was a 2 and a half month mistake? Was it?"

Alex had no words. He stood there, watching John slip away from him. 

"These are all the letters you've ever wrote me," John said, holding them in his shaking hands. "You say you loved me in them. You don't." A tear dropped landed on the letter, smudging the word 'love.' 

John flicked his lighter until there was a small flame, burning. 

"Don't do this John," Alex whispered. "Please, baby, I love you! Only you," Alex was prepared to throw himself at John's feet. 

"I hope that you burn," John whispered, setting the edge of the paper aflame. He watched it burn for a few seconds, time seemingly stop. Alex looked at the letters then up at John, fear and guilt in her eyes.

John dropped the firey mess and ran out of the dorm. 

He put his head in his hands, whispering 

"I hope that you burn..."