Supernatural Preferences & Imagines

Castiel Imagine

Cancer

It's been two years since you were diagnosed, and the hunting life had quickly slipped from your grasp. The hospital seemed to envelope your life more and more till the point you barely could go outside anymore.

It sucked, but it wasn't the worst part.

You stared at Castiel, who sat beside you, holding your hand and staring lovingly at you. He leaned forward to give you a kiss but you turned your head, letting his lips fall on your cheek.

The hardest part was leaving him.

Castiel frowned, backing down. You sighed and closed your eyes, your eyes tearing up. A humorless laugh escaped your throat as you shook your head. The doctors said you had one month. And despite how he might, you wouldn't let Castiel heal you. Even though you wanted to do so many more things, you weren't going to cheat death this time.

He peeked at you, his blue eyes drowned in remorse and sadness.

For you. Because of you.

"You know," your voice cracked and you smiled sadly, a tear running down your face. "I really wanted to have more dates." Castiel stayed silent, his head hanging and his hand still holding your small and frail one.

"I wanted to have the cliché proposal, you know? And a big wedding. Oh, with a beautiful dress, and have bridesmaids and groomsmen. I wanted to be walked down the aisle and hold the hand of my baby. I wanted to see them grow and get a life and have children. I wanted to have one more chance to go on a hunt."

More tears slid down and Castiel was still silent. "I want...I want to give you that." His voice cracked, surprising you. He had been strong throughout it all. You turned to him and he looked up, his face stained with tears. His blue eyes were red and around his eyes. Your lip wobbled and you closed your eyes, looking away as a sob threatened to force its way up past your mouth.

You didn't want to leave him. It would hurt. You would leave him, and it wasn't what you wanted. But it would.

The door opened as you turned back to Castiel. "Please," you begged, your lips chapped and dull along with the rest of you, "don't say that. Please, don't..." Castiel frowned once more and gripped your hand tighter and stood up, getting closer to you. He forced you to look at him and you looked down. His hand tilted your head up and he stared you in the eye.

"I won't apologize. I love you, [Y/N], and I will kiss you because I don't want regret anything."

You let out the silent sob and Cas took you in his arms, his full and soft lips kissing the top of your head. Two more presences filled the room and you sniffled and looked up. "Did you?" Sam bit his lip, looking up and then down before looking at you with tears in his eyes. He blinked and they fell, his face torn. Dean didn't even look at you, just fell beside you in the chair Castiel had occupied and cried.

You had them gather your things.

"And?"

Dean looked up, his eyes red and his face wet. "Yes."

A sad smile made its way on your face before you saw someone standing in the doorway. They looked to be about crying too. "Who are you?" Dean said more harshly, his emotions everywhere. The girl frowned, tears falling down her face before she ran off. You leaned into Cas, his hands massaging your pounding head. "Has she eaten or drank anything?" You felt the subtle shake of Cas' head. You closed your eyes, they felt like weights.

You opened them and saw Dean and Sam on either side of you, your throats tight and lips dry. You felt someone behind you and sighed. Castiel.

You stared up at him weakly, feeling weak and lead like. You stared at the two brothers before making them turn around. Cas stared down at you and you kissed him lightly on the lips like a ghost before snuggling in his chests and closing your eyes, rapid beeping filling the room. Someone shook you and you smiled lazily before going slack, closing your eyes for good.

The hardest part of this was leaving you.

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I JUST LOVE THIS IM SORRY I ALMOST CRIED DURING THIS IM AN EMOTIONAL MESS JESUS