Best Enemies

Nutmeg

I thrash around, the hessian bag scratching my face and my hands. The air surrounding my head is warm, filled with my breath. As I struggle I think about what has happened. Hanna in the hospital, all of my memories rushing back into my head, my brain swimming with the thick depression of the past.

 Everything changed when I met Hanna, she made me happy, and she made me feel normal. But that wasn't it. Felix had been a big part of my life. I met him in 2nd grade when my hair was in ponytails, three to be in fact, and my cheeks rosy. He looked at me when I walked past and he didn't expect what came next.

"Why are you looking at me Bongo!"
"I..uh..I'm so sorry I didn't think.. I mean.. I just wanted too..." He was blushing do hard and his eyes were darting around nervously.
"Be quiet, your nerd nobody talks to you. Nobody likes you." 

Looking back at it now I knew I had broken his heart. His face was full of shame. A few years later I had been bullied and I then knew what it felt like. After that I never teased Felix again. And the truth was, I talked to him, out of everyone who treated him like a piece of meat, I was the one who stood up for him.

We became really good friends and he was actually pretty reckless. When he started "dating" Hanna I got so jealous. I didn't speak to either of them for a whole two weeks and convinced Hanna that they weren't good together.

 Felix said that his parents didn't like the idea of him having a girlfriend and had to end the relationship. I was so overwhelmed with happiness I didn't even care what Hanna thought. That afternoon I kissed Felix. After that he ran away and didn't talk to me for the rest of the afternoon.

I feel a harsh pull and big hands wrapping around my stomach. I couldn't breathe. I kicked around in the bag but couldn't prevent it. For the first time I was completely helpless. The person picked me up and chucked me into what sounded like a truck and closed the rolling door. I uncurled myself and stretched out as much as I could trying to find something.

I can't believe it but my foot hit something whilst I stretched. I shuffled around and picked it up awkwardly with my elbows. It was long and pointed. I spread my legs wide and hacked away at the hessian that contained me like a potato. A small hole formed and I pressed my eye against it. I let go of the object and began to work away at the hole, making it bigger and bigger. Eventually my hand could fit through. Then my arm. Then my shoulder and head. I looked around at my surroundings and saw a dark, isolated, dirty truck. 

 It completely empty and it was very big. I didn't want to think what it was used for. A foul stench filled my nose. I continued to pull away at the bag until I could fit through the hole and I squeezed out of the bag. The floor was unusually warm and I was thrown around with every bump and jolt. All of a sudden the truck stopped and I was flung to the front which hurt a lot and made a huge clatter. I heard heavy footsteps and hushed voices outside the truck and scrambled to the object which was now unmistakably a crowbar.

 I was armed and ready for anything. I let my emotions go and reminded myself of what a strong person I was. I was never phased when I was heartbroken, I never cracked under pressure and I will not now. The roller door opened and light flooded in, blinding me. I swung vigorously at anything trying to kill the memories, trying to get past the demons. The crow bar left my hands and landed on the ground with a CLANG. 

I shrunk back into the darkness and hid in the corner. The door closed and I was bewildered. Had I really gotten away with that? Maybe I had hit him? I slid down the trucks sides and crouched down in a ball. It was getting hotter. So hot that my eyes were stinging. I started to breathe heavily, in repeat out. 

 Something was strange about this though. I could taste the air flowing down my throat making it dry and sore. I sniffed the air, chemicals. I started to panic. I couldn't breathe the air, it might be poisonous. 

By now I was hyperventilating and having really bad asthma this wasn't helping. The smell became sweet, like laying in a field with flowers around and hoping that you weren't surrounded by dog poo. It was so nice but I didn't want to trust it. 

Eventually I couldn't resist it. My eyes closed and I flopped on the warm floor which now felt like it was a bed of grass and fell asleep. I didn't know where I was, or who I was, or why I was here. I just wanted to sleep forever.

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