Dear me, Dear you

miserable at best

*Belles pov*

The doctor walked in with shock and sadness expressed all over his face

I knew I looked like a wreak but I didn't care my face was tear stained my eyes were red and puffy and my throat was sore from crying

I tried to kill myself

"Ms Gonzalez how are you feeling?"

"Fine" I managed to choke out

I felt bad for being bitter but I don't wanna be here I don't wanna be in these clothes in this bed or anywhere near this doctor and the heart monitor

"Look belle may I call you by your first name?"

I opened my mouth to say yes but I couldn't find the courage to speak so I settled for a nod

"Okay well I'm sorry belle truly I am for what ever it is going on in your life that made you want to do this to yourself but I promise things will get better"

His use of words were over used I've herd those lines a million times but I didn't say anything I just looked down like I always did

The hardest part of living is just taking breaths to stay...

I guess The doctor figured out that I wasn't in the talking mood so he went on with his work

He checked my vitals and my pulse then checked the I.V

Once he was done he gave me something for pain and to also help me sleep but I had the feeling I wouldn't get much of that tonight

All the sudden a nurse rushed in here and yelled at the doctor about some kind of emergency

The doctor ran out and joined all the others

Then there was a hospital bed with a patient on it being rushed away

I could see her long hair fall as they quickly took her away

Her hair was beautiful

I was upset I felt a lump in my throat because I wanted to cry but I know I couldn't I didn't have it in me anymore

I took a deep breath and tried to keep myself from having another mental break down

I looked around for things to keep me busy but I couldn't find anything

"Ugh"

I ran my cold fingers through my messy hair

Right when I was about to give up I found the t.v. remote

"Might as well find some music on the t.v. or something to listen too so maybe I can try too sleep"

When I turned on the it was on the news which I don't mind listening too

The tv read car accident today January 5 at 11:45 p.m

"Holy Fucking shit I've been out for a damn month?!"

I decided to listen to the news instead of dwelling any further on my thoughts

"Today at 11:45 p.m. a tragic accident accrued young 16 year old fay  Reeves life was cut short due to a Hurd of deer her vehicle lost control and flipped she was pronounced dead at the scene"