AMACon 3: Oikos - Children

Eros - Chapter Seven

Manila, April 2008

The church was filled with people, mostly people he didn't know. It was Maine's wedding day, the first time he and his family would see her in so many years. From the time her father took her from his parents' house, she never made contact with them including him, having been whisked off to different countries, depending on where her dad is assigned as a consul under the Department of Foreign Affairs.

He looked forward to seeing her again, and was glad to know she was getting married. He felt guilty for not trying hard enough to find her. He was too busy trying to cope with the challenges of their business then, until time just slipped away.

He hated weddings. His failed marriages burned him, turning into this jaded mess of a man who was pining for girl he had a one night stand with. His search failed, even hiring an investigator failed to bring him any clues on her identity. She was obviously just a visitor in New York, probably a tourist on a holiday. But she seemed so sure she knew him, and knew him well, not just as an acquaintance.

The crowd suddenly hushed as the wedding march began. He wasn't really paying attention to the entourage, his mind was on Dei and how he could find her. He turned his head towards the back casually, wanting to see Maine.

And there she was. Dei. His Dei. Dressed as a bride, walking down the aisle, looking beautiful in her pristine white wedding gown, flanked by her father. The color drained from his face, his knees felt weak, he felt increasingly light-headed. Their eyes met, he saw her face change, as she bit her lip and her eyes glistened with unshed tears.

"Sorry." Her lips mouthed, as she gave a lingering glance to him before she passed his pew. He swooned, feeling the need to sit down.

"Son, are you ok?" Charo asked, a worried look on her face.

"It's just the heat, ma. I think I need to go outside." He almost ran out of the church and into the men's room, emptying his stomach, retching into the sink.

-----

He never got to see the rest of the wedding rites. He couldn't, even if he wanted to. He drove listlessly around, crying, trying to make sense of everything. He wondered what drove her to do the things she did that night, concluding it was planned. She purposely sought him out, not letting him know who she was, and gave herself to him, sharing with him a very special moment of every girl, her first time. He didn't know what to feel. A part of him felt manipulated, betrayed, and a part of him felt....loved.

She was not a blood relative, but he always looked at her as his sibling, although he would not deny there was a bond that went beyond the closeness of brother and sister running between them. In his early years, he was her father, taking care of her on weekends, waking up late at night to sing her lullabyes in his room, cradling her in his arms. As she grew up till she was seven, he was her hero, more and more they grew closer, but he began to see her as his little sister.

The years away dulled the pain of separation, and he got engrossed with adult life, till he was eaten up by the daily grind. He should have tried harder to find her, he felt that regret now with an intense ache. He stopped the car and leaned forward on the steering wheel, drying his tears. His eyes caught the wedding invitation on the dashboard, seeing her name etched in gold.

"Andrea Mendoza."

She wasn't lying when she gave him her legal name, knowing fully well an alarm bell would ring if she gave him her old name. Backtracking to that fateful night, he checked the date and felt a pang of guilt. March 3, it really was her birthday, and he forgot.

-----

The wedding reception was already in full swing when he arrived. He missed most of the program, people have already finished eating. The bride was already dancing with her husband, looking quite happy with her groom.

"Where have you been? Maine has been looking for you." Richard Sr. looked at him curiously.

"I wasn't feeling well, pa. I took a nap."

"Are you ok now?"

"Not really. Can we leave already?"

"No, Maine expects us to stay a bit. Don't you want to say hi and catch up?"

He looked and caught her staring at him, her eyes pensive. Their gaze met and held. Maybe he could talk to her, even for just a few minutes. Her dad was now dancing with her, but her eyes were on him.

"I'm going to dance with her," He said as he determinedly got up and walked to the dance floor.

He walked to the center of the dance floor, tapping her father lightly on the shoulder. He smiled tightly, extending his hand.

"May I cut in sir?"

"Dad, this is Richard, my............kuya."

"Oh, hi Richard. Nice to finally meet you. Dei talks incessantly about you. Glad you can make it." They shake hands and Dei's father extends Dei's to him. He takes her ice cold hand, pulling her close to him with a hand around her waist, feeling his face flush with desire.

"I'm giving you three minutes to explain what you did to me Maine....Dei. I fucking deserve an explanation."

"I love you." She whispered the words against his ear, then looked steadily at him.

"Do you understand what you're saying? I left you when you were just seven, I haven't seen you for the longest time."

"Still, Richard. I love you. I never stopped looking for you. I follow all your social media accounts, gathered all the news about you and your coffee shops. I even attended one of your motivational seminars for college students. It's creepy, I know."

"Dei, this is crazy. You should have told me who you were when we met."

"Would you have been intimate with me had you known who I really was?"

"But why did you marry this man? Why marry him if you really love me?"

She laughed mirthlessly. "Do you really think mama would allow us to have a relationship? You're 12 years older than I am, we were brother and sister for so many years. Can you imagine how people will talk about us?"

"Didn't you stop to think how this would affect me?"

"But you've been married. What's one more girl to fuck for you?"

"Dei....That wasn't just a one-night stand. Damn you, I fell for you that night. I was looking for you. I hired someone to find you. I should be thankful he didn't."

She looked at him with hope in her eyes, hope that he felt the same way she did. "Richard, I need to see you again."

"No, this dance is about to end, your husband is coming."

"Please, we'll just talk. I'll call you. I have your card."

He never replied, and merely smiled as he passed on her hand to her husband. Without a second glance, he left the reception area and went straight to the car. Too much, he couldn't take it all in.

"Did you talk to him, Dei?"

"Yes but you came to us so soon."

"Dei, you were looking at him with so much desire, I had to step in."

"Thanks for looking out for me Brandon. Ugh.....I feel nauseated again."

"You eat too much, that's why."

"Don..... what if I'm pregnant?"

"Then good. That will convince people I'm straight."